Subject: Communication (Page 65)

The bigger the mouth, the better it looks shut.

Communication Speech

Invitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

writer
Communication Wordplay

I’ve given up asking rhetorical questions… what’s the point?

(1952 – ) British stand-up comedian, actor & author
Communication Speech

Diplomacy: The patriotic art of lying for one’s country.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language Lies

My grandma always says that she never gets any phone calls; so, for her birthday, I put one of those ‘How’s my driving?’ bumper stickers on her car.

comedian
Autos Communication Relationships

Bathing Suit: A garment cut to see level.

Appearance Clothing Definitions Wordplay

When you talk to him, he looks at you and grins and grins and nods and nods and appears to be the world's best listener, until you realize he is not listening at all.

(1933 – ) television & radio host
Conversation People

The first draft of anything is shit.

(1899 – 1961) author & journalist
Communication Reading/Writing

When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Communication Food/Drink Language

Always leave room to add an explanation if it doesn't work out.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Problems

A simple story, however inaccurate or misleading, is preferred to a complicated explanation, however true.

Communication Murphy’s Laws

Umm, trouble with grammar have I, yes?

Movie character in, Star Wars (Frank Oz)
Communication Language TV/Movie Quotes

Honeymoon: The morning after the knot before.

Communication Definitions Marriage

A bit of advice: never read a pop-up book about giraffes.

(1963 – ) English comedian & actor
Animals Books Communication

Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone?

(1894 – 1961) author, cartoonist & humorist
Communication Situations Things

His speeches left the impression of an army of pompous phrases moving over the landscape in search of an idea.

(1863 – 1941) U.S. senator (California) & U.S. Secretary of the Treasury
Communication Ideas Speech

Alphabet: A toy for children found in books, blocks, pictures, and some soup.

Communication Definitions Language

“Good morning” is a contradiction of terms.

(1945 –) American cartoonist (Garfield)
Communication Language

Children always take the line of most persistence.

writer
Children Family Wordplay

Never get into an argument with a schizophrenic person and say, "Who do you think you are?"

(1956 – 1996) American comedian, actor & television host
Communication Speech

Why should I talk to you?… I've just been talking to your boss.

(1876 – 1933) screenwriter
Beliefs Communication Death God