Subject: Communication (Page 67)

When I was 10, my pa told me never to talk to strangers; we haven’t spoken since.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Communication Family Fathers People Speech

You’ve got to take the bitter with the sour.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Characteristics Misspokements Speech

One “Oh shit” can erase a thousand “Attaboys.”

(1957 – ) cartoonist (Dilbert)
Characteristics Communication

Studying literature at Harvard is like learning about women at the Mayo Clinic.

(1941) American writer & humorist
Communication Language Reading/Writing

There are worse things than getting a call for the wrong number at 4 a.m… it could be the right number.

(1926 – ) newspaper columnist
Communication Time

Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens.

Characteristics Communication Lies

During an election campaign the air is full of speeches and vice versa.

(1838 – 1918) journalist, historian, academic & novelist
Communication Elections/Voting Government Speech

If a man is talking in the forest, and there is no woman there to hear him, is he still wrong?

Communication Men People Speech Women

Making a speech on economics is a lot like pissing down your leg; it seems hot to you, but it never does to anyone else.

(1908 – 1973) 36th U.S. president
Beliefs Communication Opinion Speech

Judge: A man in a trying position.

Definitions Wordplay

director I spent four years in college but I didn’t learn a thing; i was really my own fault… I had a double major in psychology and reverse psychology.

(1979 – ) American actor, writer, comedian & director
Communication Education Wordplay

Once you overcome your fear of public speaking, you’ll never be asked to speak again.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Speech

If you lend someone an ear, don’t expect to be repaid with interest.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Communication

The politician is an acrobat; he keeps his balance by doing the opposite of what he says.

(1862 – 1923) French writer & politician
Communication Government Politicians

Ya better keep a civilian tongue in your head.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Communication Malaprops Speech

The loss of life will be irreplaceable.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Communication Misspokements Speech

She’d complain if Jesus came down and handed her a $5 bill.

Characteristics Communication

I believe that people would be alive today if there were a death penalty.

(1921 – ) former First Lady of the United States & actress
Communication Misspokements Speech

The musician who invented Swing ought to.

Communication Entertainment Music

When the American people get through with the English language, it will look as if it had been run over by a musical comedy.

(1867 – 1936) author & humorist
America Communication Language Places

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Language Money