Subject: Communication (Page 69)

Matrimony: The splice of life.

Definitions Marriage Wordplay

It sounds like typewriters eating tin foil being kicked down the stairs.

(1971 – ) Irish comedian, actor & writer
Communication Places Speech

Like a whore – first, I did it for my own pleasure; then I did it for the pleasure of my friends; and now… I do it for money.

(1878 – 1952) Hungarian-born American dramatist & novelist
Communication Reading/Writing

If people listened to themselves more often, they'd talk less.

Communication Murphy’s Laws People Speech

A lot of people are very critical of modern reproductive processes without understanding all the ins and outs.

(1940 – ) English professor, medical doctor, scientist & politician
Sex Wordplay

If one could only teach the English how to talk, and the Irish how to listen, society here would be quite civilized.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Communication England People Places Speech

If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all, Creep.

(1935 – ) columnist, journalist & novelist
Communication

Your manuscript is both good and original, but the part that is good is not original and the part that is original is not good.

(1709 – 1784) English author, essayist, critic, editor & lexicographer
Communication Reading/Writing Reviews/Criticism

A stupid man’s report of what a clever man says is never accurate because he unconsciously translates what he hears into something he can understand.

(1872 – 1970) British philosopher, mathematician, historian & social critic
Communication Intelligence

Its important to use apostrophe's right.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

If you talk about yourself, he’ll think you’re boring; if you talk about others, he’ll think you’re a gossip; if you talk about him, he’ll think you’re a brilliant conversationalist.

Communication Dating Intelligence Speech

Yankees' owner George Steinbrenner is a first-and-ten capitalist in a bunt-and-run world.

American sportswriter
Baseball Communication Sports

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter; some day I intend reading it.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Books Reviews/Criticism

He who believes that the past cannot be changed has not yet written his memoirs.

(1910 – 2006) Swedish cartoonist
Communication Past Reading/Writing Time

They say you shouldn’t say nothin’ about the dead unless it’s good; he’s dead… good!

(1894 – 1975) American comedian
Communication Death Speech

If you can wave a fan, and you can wave a club, can you wave a fan club?


Communication Language Things

Alphabet: A toy for children found in books, blocks, pictures, and some soup.

Communication Definitions Language

Wooing the press is an exercise roughly akin to picnicking with a tiger; you might enjoy the meal, but the tiger always eats last.

(1952 – ) American columnist & author
Communication Reading/Writing

When I was a child my father attacked me with cameras; I still have flashbacks.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language Things

I don’t think I got the job at Microsoft™… they didn’t respond to my telegram.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Work

If you miss one issue of any magazine, it will be the issue that contains the article, story or installment you were most anxious to read.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing