Subject: Communication (Page 79)

Never hold discussions with the monkey when the organ grinder is in the room.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Communication Situations

About the only thing you can say for his constipation of ideas is his diarrhea of words.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor
Communication Ideas Insults Intelligence Speech

My boss told me to get my butt in gear… I told him I was shiftless.

(1966 – ) American stand-up comic
Communication Language Work

Last night I fell asleep in a satellite dish… my dreams were broadcast all over the world.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Communication Situations Sleep World

The first man to compare the cheeks of a young woman to a rose was obviously a poet; the first to repeat it was possibly an idiot.

(1904 – 1989) Spanish surrealist painter
Fools Intelligence Language

You can get away with anything as long as you tell someone about it.

Communication Murphy’s Laws

The difference between fiction and reality… fiction has to make sense.

(1947 – ) American author
Books Communication

Henry Kissinger may be a great writer, but anyone finishes his book is definitely a great reader.

(1952 – ) American writer & biographer
Communication People Reading/Writing

Beware of the conversationalist who adds “in other words;” he is merely starting afresh.

(1890 – 1957) author & journalist
Communication Conversation

You want to go out tonight? We could grab an Italian. And then go for dinner afterwards.

(1963 – ) Canadian-American actor
TV/Movie Quotes Wordplay

The man who doesn’t read good books has no advantage over the man who can’t read them.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Books Communication Reading/Writing

The road to hell is paved with adverbs.

(1947 – ) novelist, screenwriter
Communication Language Reading/Writing Things

A satirist is a man who discovers unpleasant things about himself and then says them about other people.

(1924 – ) Canadian writer
Communication People Self

Will you take this woman to be your awful wedded wife?

(1914 – 1953) Welsh-born poet & writer
Communication Marriage Wordplay

The future will be better tomorrow.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Communication Future Misspokements Speech

Umm, trouble with grammar have I, yes?

Movie character in, Star Wars (Frank Oz)
Communication Language TV/Movie Quotes

I will be so brief I have already finished.

(1904 – 1989) Spanish surrealist painter
Communication Speech

This book of essays… has all the depth and glitter of a worn dime.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Books Reviews/Criticism

In Russia a man is called reactionary if he objects to having his property stolen and his wife and children murdered.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Communication Government Places

Theodore Dreiser should ought to write nicer.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Reviews/Criticism Wordplay

One of the greatest creations of the human mind is the art of reviewing books without having read them.

(1742 – 1799) German writer
Books Communication Reading/Writing