Subject: Communication (Page 81)

I don’t own a cell phone or a pager; I just hang around everyone I know, all the time.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Communication

Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Communication Misspokements Speech

He was married to an acrobat, but she caught him in the act.

Communication Wordplay

His tongue was an unguided missile.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Communication Language

A professor is one who talks in someone else’s sleep.

(1907 – 1973) poet & critic
Situations Sleep Speech

The mediocrity of his thinking is concealed by the majesty of his language.

(1897 – 1960) Welsh labor leader & politician
Communication Speech

It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor
Reading/Writing

The loss of life will be irreplaceable.

(1947 – ) U.S. vice president & politician
Communication Misspokements Speech

There’s very little advice in men’s magazines, because men think, I know what I’m doing; just show me somebody naked.

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor
Communication Reading/Writing Sex

The trouble with telling a good story is that it invariably reminds the other fellow of a dull one.

(1922 – 2014) American comic actor & writer
Communication Speech

If you have a burning, restless urge to write or paint, simply eat something sweet and the feeling will pass.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Art Communication Entertainment Reading/Writing

If you talk about yourself, he’ll think you’re boring; if you talk about others, he’ll think you’re a gossip; if you talk about him, he’ll think you’re a brilliant conversationalist.

Communication Dating Intelligence Speech

In court I was found guilty of being egotistical… I am appealing.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay

I dislike arguments of any kind; they are always vulgar, and often convincing.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Communication

After you’ve mailed your last card, you will receive a card from someone you overlooked.

Communication Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

Swearing was invented as a compromise between running away and fighting.

(1867 – 1936) author & humorist
Communication Language

If Attila the Hun were alive today, he'd be a drama critic.

(1928 – ) playwright
Communication Entertainment Reading/Writing

Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.

(1888 – 1965) British (US-born) critic, dramatist & poet
Communication People Problems

An intellectual is a man who takes more words than necessary to tell more than he knows.

(1890 – 1969) 34th U.S. president, U.S. Army General
Communication Intelligence Speech

Do people in Australia, call the rest of the world, "Up Over"?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language Places Speech

My piñata costume was a hit with the crowd

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay