Subject: Communication (Page 82)

The enemy never monitors your radio frequency until you broadcast on an unsecured channel.

Communication Military

Before I speak, I have something important to say.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Communication Speech

All I had to my name were some letters and all I had in my pocket was a broken compass; I didn’t know which way to turn.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay

To avoid misunderstanding, I’ll stop speaking formal English and just use the binocular.

Communication Language Malaprops

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Communication Entertainment Music

Wife Swapping: Sexual fourplay.

Definitions Marriage Sex Wordplay

I think it would be really confusing if you’re performing an abortion and somebody runs in and says, “Abort! Abort!”

(1981 – ) American comedian, writer & actor
Communication Language Situations

The poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese.

(1874 – 1936) English author & mystery novelist
Communication Reading/Writing

I once knew a woman who offered her honor, so I honored her offer, and all night long I was on her and off her.

Sex Wordplay

Groan: An expression of appreciation for the horrible.

Communication Definitions Speech

When people say “It’s always the last place you look;” of course it is… why would you keep looking after you’ve found it?

(1942 – ) Scottish comedian, musician & actor
Communication

[Punter] Bill Bradley kicks them so high and so short you can't run them back; you have to fair catch every one. Us coaches call that the punt of no return.

(1931 – 2012) American college football historian & television commentator
Football Language Sports

A funeral eulogy is a belated plea for the defense delivered after the evidence is all in.

(1876 – 1944) American author, humorist & columnist
Communication Death Speech

An encyclopedia is a system for collecting dust in alphabetical order.

British writer, cartoonist, poet & performer
Books Communication

I like to do all the talking myself; it saves time, and prevents arguments.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Communication Speech

When dangling, don't use participles.

Communication Language Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing

A biography is a book that is usually written about a dead person because it is so unlike him when he was alive.

(1899 – 1995) humorist
Books Characteristics Communication Reading/Writing

Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools, because they have to say something.

(427 BC – 347 BC) Greek author & philosopher
Communication Fools Intelligence Speech Wisdom

The freedom of the press works in such a way that there is not much freedom from it.

(1929 – 1982) American actress & princess of Monaco
Communication Speech

A good novel tells us the truth about it's hero; but a bad novel tells us the truth about its author.

(1874 – 1936) English author & mystery novelist
Books Characteristics Communication Honesty Reading/Writing Truth

A good sermon should be like a woman's skirt: short enough to rouse the interest, but long enough to cover the essentials.

(1888 – 1957) English priest & theologian
Communication