Subject: Communication (Page 9)

I used to be in a band called ‘Missing Cat’… you probably saw our posters.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Language Situations

It is a cliché that most clichés are true, but then like most clichés, that cliché is untrue.

(1957 – ) English actor, writer, journalist, comedian & film director
Communication Language

He was engaged to a contortionist, but she broke it off.

Communication Relationships Wordplay

The first coherent line ever spoken was ‘I have no idea what you’re talking about.’

(1962 – ) English stand-up comedian & actor
Communication Intelligence Speech Understanding

I think one of the most groundbreaking inventions of all time is the jackhammer.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Communication Language Things

When I ask what time it is – I don't need to know how the watch is built.

Communication Expressions Speech

A woman's preaching is like a dog's walking on his hinter legs; it is not done well; but you are surprised to see it done at all.

(1740 – 1795) Scottish lawyer, diarist & author
Communication People Speech Women

I don’t have any children but if I had a baby I would have to name it so I’d buy a “baby naming book” … or I would invite somebody over who had a cast on.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Books Children Family

To avoid misunderstanding, I’ll stop speaking formal English and just use the binocular.

Communication Language Malaprops

A good listener is a good talker with a sore throat.

(1928 – ) British journalist, writer & columnist
Communication Health Speech

Science Fiction: Fairy tales for nerds.

Communication Definitions Science/Weather

The president of France said that the English are arrogant with their refusal to learn foreign languages; at least, I think that’s what he said… it all just sounded like “haw-he-haw-he-haw-he-haw.”

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
Communication England Language Places

Let’s bring it up to date with some snappy nineteenth century dialogue.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Communication Misspokements Speech

First time I ever read the dictionary, I thought it was a poem about everything.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Books Communication Reading/Writing

A million monkeys were given a million typewriters… it’s called the Internet.

(1967 – ) English comedian
Communication Things

In no time, it will be a forgotten memory.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Communication Memory Misspokements Speech Time

Spanish? I thought they were just English words I didn't know.

(1971 – ) American actress
Communication Language TV/Movie Quotes

I’m an Atheist… thank God.

(1936 – 2005) Irish comedian
Beliefs God Religion Wordplay

All of ‘em, any of ‘em that have been in front of me over all these years.

(1964 – ) U.S. governor (Alaska) commentator & author
Communication Misspokements

He knew the precise psychological moment when to say nothing.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Communication

Writing free verse is like playing tennis with the net down.

(1874 – 1963) American poet
Communication Reading/Writing