Subject: Communication » Wordplay

The baby wakes up in the wee wee hours of the morning.

Children Family Wordplay

A rule of thumb in the matter of medical advice is to take everything any doctor says with a grain of aspirin.


Doctors Health Wordplay

Theodore Dreiser should ought to write nicer.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Reviews/Criticism Wordplay

Racehorse: A barn athlete.

Animals Definitions Wordplay

I remember what my grandmother said to me on her deathbed: She said: ‘I wish I’d bought a normal bed.’

British stand-up comedian, writer & actor
Communication Death Last words Wordplay

Gold Digger: A woman after all.

Definitions People Women Wordplay

When someone tells me they're from Switzerland I think, that's a red flag.

Comedian & writer
Communication Wordplay

Oregon leads America in both marital infidelity and clinical depression… what a sad state of affairs.


Communication Wordplay

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

(1973 – ) English comedian, writer, actor, director & producer
Communication Wordplay

You can wait here in the sitting room, or you can sit here in the waiting room.

American comedy troupe
Communication Wordplay

How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Things Wordplay

I felt like a man trapped in a woman's body… then I was born.

American stand up comedian & juggler
Communication Wordplay

Why do they call that funny little statue a bust when it stops right before the part of the body that it’s named after?

(1946 – ) American comedian
Art Communication Wordplay

I used to be a plastic surgeon, which raised a few eyebrows.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Occupations Wordplay Work

I have the brain of a German Shepard and the body of 16-year-old boy… they're both in my car and I want you to see them.

(1956 – ) American stand-up comedian, actor & television ho
Miscellaneous Wordplay

I got a new dog… he’s a paranoid retriever; he brings back everything because he’s not sure what I threw him.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Animals Dogs Wordplay

Peeping Tom: A window fan.

Definitions Wordplay

Umpire: The original strike arbitrator.

Definitions Wordplay

Who remembers when X Factor was just Roman suncream?

British comedian
Communication Wordplay

There’s nothing to fear but life itself.

(1947 – ) comedian & actor
Emotions Fear Wordplay

Hou know what always captures my eye… short people with umbrellas.

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
Communication Wordplay