Subject: Communication » Wordplay (Page 4)

If these walls could talk, they'd probably say, "No! Not the nails again! Not the hammer!

Communication Wordplay

Bathing Suit: A garment cut to see level.

Appearance Clothing Definitions Wordplay

Realtor: A man with lots to sell.

Definitions Occupations Wordplay

Snoring: Sheet music.

Definitions Sleep Wordplay

Paradox: Two physicians.

Definitions Doctors Wordplay

At school the other kids used to push me around and call me lazy; I loved that wheelchair.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay

She was another of his near Mrs.

Communication Language Marriage Relationships Wordplay

Alcatraz: A pen with a lifetime guarantee.

Definitions Wordplay

I really wanted kids when I was in my early 20s but I could just never… lure them into my car; no, I'm kidding… I don’t have a license.

(1980 – ) Australian comedian
Children Communication Family Wordplay

Invitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

writer
Communication Wordplay

If pro is the opposite of con, is progress the opposite of congress?

(1946 – ) American comedian
Communication Wordplay

All really grim gardeners possess a keen sense of humus.

(1898 – 1951) Scottish humorist
Activities Wordplay

To eat is human, to digest, divine.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Eating Food/Drink Wordplay

I went to [a bookstore] and asked the woman for a book about turtles; she said ‘hardback?’ and I was like, ‘yeah, and little heads.

British comedian
Books Communication Wordplay

Man was predestined to have free will.

Beliefs Wordplay

“Pickup artists” and “garbagemen” should switch names.

Occupations Wordplay Work

Some hospitals are so crowded that the only way you can get in is by accident.


Health Wordplay

All I had to my name were some letters and all I had in my pocket was a broken compass; I didn’t know which way to turn.

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay

Just read a book about Stockholm Syndrome; it started off badly, but by the end I really liked it.

(1927 – 2018) British comedian, singer & songwriter
Books Communication Reading/Writing Wordplay

Castration: A eunuch experience.

Definitions Wordplay

My girlfriend’s dog died, so to cheer her up I went out and got her an identical one: She was livid… “What am I going to do with two dead dogs?”

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
Animals Dogs Wordplay