Subject: Communication » Wordplay (Page 8)

Why do they call that funny little statue a bust when it stops right before the part of the body that it’s named after?

(1946 – ) American comedian
Art Communication Wordplay

All really grim gardeners possess a keen sense of humus.

(1898 – 1951) Scottish humorist
Activities Wordplay

I went to [a bookstore] and asked the woman for a book about turtles; she said ‘hardback?’ and I was like, ‘yeah, and little heads.

British comedian
Books Communication Wordplay

Why is it, when a door is open it’s ajar, but when a jar is open, it’s not a door?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay

Tissue: Your daily nosepaper.

Definitions Wordplay

I phoned up the spiritual leader of Tibet, he sent me a large goat with a long neck, turns out I phoned dial-a-lama.

(1964 – ) English comedian
Communication Wordplay

Do Roman paramedics refer to IV’s as ‘4’s’?

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Communication Wordplay

I’m good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet… I don’t know why.

British comedian
Communication Wordplay

The Houston Astros play in a vast indoor stadium known as the Astrodome, but the problem is they field a half-vast team.

American baseball player
Baseball Sports Wordplay

I hate going to funerals because I’m not a mourning person.

(1946 – ) American comedian, actor & voice actor
Communication Death Wordplay

Kids in back seats cause accidents, accidents in back seats cause kids.

Children Family Sex Wordplay

Sad news, apparently the Michelin Man has retired.

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
Communication Wordplay

Yodeling: Slope opera.

Definitions Wordplay

President Ford tells us all to bite the bullet and Betsy Ford goes on TV and shoots off her mouth.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Communication TV/Movie Quotes Wordplay

director I spent four years in college but I didn’t learn a thing; i was really my own fault… I had a double major in psychology and reverse psychology.

(1979 – ) American actor, writer, comedian & director
Communication Education Wordplay

A kiss that speaks volumes is seldom a first edition.

(1892 – 1972) American comedian, dancer & composer
Emotions Sex Wordplay

Racehorse: A barn athlete.

Animals Definitions Wordplay

Polygamy – the art of  parrot-folding.

comic actor-writer
Communication Definitions Wordplay

Snoring: Sheet music.

Definitions Sleep Wordplay

Matrimony: The splice of life.

Definitions Marriage Wordplay

I am his awfully-wedded wife.

(1905 – 1974) radio comedian
Malaprops Marriage Wordplay