Subject: Conflict » Fights

The fights you avoid do you far more good than the ones you will win.

Conflict Fights Proverbs

I look at fighting the same way I look at physics; I can’t do it, but I respect its ability to solve problems.

comedian
Conflict Fights

We know how much fans enjoy a good brawl, so we are going to guarantee a fight. If there is not a single five-minute fighting major given to a player, every fan in attendance will receive a free ticket to the following home game.

Conflict Fights Hockey Sports

For my birthday I got a humidifier and a dehumidifier… I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Conflict Fights Things

The Middle Eastern states aren’t nations, they’re quarrels with borders.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Conflict Fights Places

You might be a redneck if… you got into a fistfight at your last yard sale.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Conflict Fights People Rednecks

If it weren’t for marriage, husband and wives would have to fight with strangers.

(1919 – 1985) Scottish comedian & actor
Conflict Fights Marriage

If you ever see me getting beaten by the police, put down the video camera and come help me.

(1962 – ) comedian, actor, voice actor, screenwriter, & film & television director
Conflict Fights Situations

When I got through with him, he was all covered wit' blood… my blood.

(1893 – 1980) American singer, pianist, comedian & actor
Conflict Fights Self

Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Conflict Fights

Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Fights Sex

If I play badly I’ll pick a fight in the third, just to get into a fight. I’ll break a guy’s leg to win, I don’t care. Afterward I say, ‘Yeah, all right I played badly, but I won the fight so who gives a damn.'

Canadian hockey player
Conflict Fights Hockey Sports

If you can’t beat them, arrange 
to have them beaten

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Conflict Fights

Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Conflict Eating Fights Food/Drink Life Success

I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out.

(1924 – 1987) American stand-up ‘deadpan’ comedian and actor
Activities Conflict Fights Hockey Sports

I will personally challenge anyone who wants to get rid of fighting to a fight.

American-Canadian hockey executive
Fights Hockey Sports

If hockey fights were fake, I'd be in more of them.

professional hockey player
Fights Hockey Sports

It's hard to fight when you're in a gazebo.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Conflict Fights

No matter how much the cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens.

(1809 – 1865) 16th U.S. president
Animals Cats Conflict Fights

I'd rather fight than score.

Canadian hockey player
Conflict Fights Hockey Sports

The world is a dangerous place; only yesterday I went into [a store] and punched someone in the face.

English musician, actor, writer & comedian
Conflict Fights Places World