Subject: Conflict (Page 2)

Every fight is a food fight when you’re a cannibal.

(1973 – ) American comedian
Conflict Fights Food/Drink

Capital Punishment: Killing people who kill people to prove that killing people is wrong.

Crime Death Definitions Killing

Mines are equal opportunity weapons.

Arms Military Murphy’s Laws

She doesn't understand the concept of Roman numerals; she thought we just fought in world war eleven.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Intelligence War

All humor is based on hostility – that’s why World War II was funny.

(1927 – 2018) playwright & screenwriter
Conflict Emotions War

The bigger they are, the harder they hit.

Fights Murphy’s Laws

Pickpocket: A man who believes that every crowd has a silver lining.

Crime Definitions

A Canadian is sort of like an American, but without the gun.

America Arms Conflict People Places

Men who drink herbal teas are seldom serial killers.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Conflict Killing Men People

Whenever A annoys or injures B on the pretense of saving or improving X, A is a scoundrel.

Characteristics Conflict Murphy’s Laws

True friends stab you in the front.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Conflict Friends Old People

Never advise anyone to go to war or to marry.

Marriage Proverbs War

Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.

(1937 – 2008) stand-up comedian, social critic, actor & author
Fights Sex

Dick Cheney says he loves California… out here the rich and famous can shoot people and get away with it.

(1950 – ) comedian & television host
Arms Conflict People Places

I do have some sad news to report: Bjork could not be here; she was trying on her Oscars dress and Dick Cheney shot her.

(1962 – ) American political satirist, writer, television host & comedian
Conflict

Smart bombs have bad days too.

Arms Military Murphy’s Laws

Don't worry if you're a kleptomaniac, you can always take something for it.

Conflict Crime People

All I know is, finally I get to kill somebody.

American actor
Conflict Killing TV/Movie Quotes

Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion.


(1934 – 2012) American army general
Conflict Places War

You might be a redneck if… you got into a fistfight at your last yard sale.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Conflict Fights People Rednecks

Criminal: A person with predatory instincts who has not sufficient capital to form a corporation.

(1890 – 1970) American engineer
Conflict Crime