Subject: Death (Page 11)

I am about to – or I am going to – die: either expression is correct.

(1628 – 1702) French grammarian
Last words

Drug Kingpin Amado Fuentes died from 9 hours of liposuction and plastic surgery – or, as it's commonly known here in Beverly Hills, natural causes.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Death Health Places

Eulogy: Praise that’s too much and too late.

Death Definitions

Always read something that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.

(1947 – ) author, humorist & satirist
Books Communication Death Reading/Writing

Being Dead Is No Excuse: The Official Southern Ladies’ Guide to Hosting the Perfect Funeral

Book Titles Death

Why not? After all, it belongs to him.

(1889 – 1977) English comedian, actor & film director
Last words

An epitaph is a belated advertisement for a line of goods that has been discontinued.

(1876 – 1944) American author, humorist & columnist
Death Epitaphs

The operation was a complete success, but the patient died of something else.

Death Doctors Health

Gonna be incrimated… they’re gonna keep the ashes around the house in one of them silver urinals.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Death Malaprops

Early to rise and early to bed makes a male healthy and wealthy and dead.

(1894 – 1961) author, cartoonist & humorist
Death Life Men People Time

Don't worry, they usually don't swim backwards.

(1962 – 2006) Australian television personality, wildlife expert & conservationist
Last words

Take away those pillows. I shall need them no more.

(1832 – 1898) English author, mathematician, logician & photographer
Last words

Are you happy?  I'm happy.

(1879 – 1959) American actress
Last words

Everybody has to die, but I always believed an exception would be made in my case.

(1908 – 1981) American dramatist & author
Death

I told my girlfriend when I was going to die, because my birth certificate had an expiration date on it.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Death

Electrocution: Burning at the stake with all modern improvements.

Death Definitions

Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Death Things Time

Suicide is man's way of telling God, "You can't fire me – I quit."

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Beliefs Death God

This is how you die.

(1883 – 1971) French fashion designer & founder of the Chanel brand
Death Last words

That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Death Places

Die, my dear? Why, that's the last thing I'll do!

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Last words