Subject: Death (Page 20)

That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Death Places

Epitaph: A belated advertisement for a line of goods that has been permanently discontinued.

Death Definitions

God will forgive me. It is his profession.

(1797 – 1856) German critic & poet
Last words

I am just going outside. I may be some time.

(1880 – 1912) English Antarctic explorer
Last words

Will: A dead giveaway.

Death Definitions

Immortality – a fate worse than death.


Death Life

Ya look like one of those pall buriers at a funeral.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Death Malaprops

The fence around a cemetery is foolish, for those inside can’t get out and those outside don’t want to get in.

(1864 – 1936) American newspaper editor & writer
Death Places

Gents, this is an educational project. You are about to witness the damaging effect electricity has on Wood.

(? – 1963) convicted murderer
Last words

Sex and death; two things that come once in a lifetime… only after death, you’re not so nauseous.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Death Sex

I don't believe that I'm going to be able to speak any longer.

(1881 – 1965) American Major League Baseball executive
Last words

Most people my age are dead at the present time.

(1890 – 1975) American baseball manager
Age Death Life Misspokements Old People Time

If anyone cries at my funeral, I will never speak to him again.

(1890 – 1965) English comic actor, writer & director (of Laurel & Hardy)
Death

Fertile Woman Dies in Climax

Death Headlines

Where is my clock?

(1904 – 1989) Spanish surrealist painter
Last words

Traffic Dead Rise Slowly

Death Headlines

A bird in the hand is dead.

Animals Death Murphy’s Laws

To stop sinning suddenly.

(1856 – 1915) writer, publisher, artist & philosopher
Death

All my possessions for a moment of time.

(1533 – 1603) Queen of England & Ireland
Last words

Death takes no bribes.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Death

Take me home. I was born in the South and I wish to die and be buried in the South.

(1856 – 1915) African-American educator, author & political leader
Last words