Subject: Death (Page 24)

Who is it? Who is it?

(1859 – 1881) American frontier gunman
Last words

Our greatest fear is to die alone, which is why I intend to take quite a few people with me.

(1972 – ) Scottish comedian
Death

I'm so bored with it all.

(1874 – 1965) British prime minister, politician, statesman & orator
Last words

Ya look like one of those pall buriers at a funeral.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Death Malaprops

Alcohol killed my first wife… I got home drunk one night and shot her.

(1948 – ) British stand-up comedian
Alcohol Conflict Death Food/Drink Killing

Smoking cures weight problems… eventually.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Activities Body Characteristics Death Fat

I've had eighteen straight whiskies, I think that's the record.

(1914 – 1953) Welsh-born poet & writer
Last words

Where there's a will, there's an inheritance tax.

Death Government Language Taxes

I’m not unwell, I’m f**king dying.

(1932 – 1997) British journalist
Death Last words

You sons of bitches, give my love to Mother!

(1912 - 1932) American convicted murderer & career criminal
Last words

They say you shouldn’t say nothin’ about the dead unless it’s good; he’s dead… good!

(1894 – 1975) American comedian
Communication Death Speech

Dear World, I am leaving because I am bored. I feel I have lived long enough. I am leaving you with your worries in this sweet cesspool. Good luck.

(1906 – 1972) Russian-born English actor, singer-songwriter & music composer
Last words

Do not hack me as you did my Lord Russell.

(1649 – 1685) English nobleman
Last words

Gents, this is an educational project. You are about to witness the damaging effect electricity has on Wood.

(? – 1963) convicted murderer
Last words

Don't make a mess of it – shoot straight, you bastards.

(1864 – 1902) Anglo-Australian drover, horseman, poet & soldier
Last words

Sex is like death… only after death you don’t feel like a pizza.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Death Food/Drink Sex

My wife said to me, "I want to be cremated." I said, "How about Tuesday?"

(1924 – 2003) American comedian & actor
Death Marriage Wives

A doctor’s reputation is made by the number of eminent men who die under his care.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Death Doctors Health

It is hovering and it's not an aircraft.

(c.1958 – presumed dead in 1978 ) Australian pilot
Last words

The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets.

(1879 – 1935) humorist & social commentator
Congress Death Government Taxes

I get my exercise from acting as a pallbearer to my friends who exercise.

(1834 – 1928) American attorney for Cornelius Vanderbilt
Activities Death Exercise