Subject: Death (Page 6)

I am about to – or I am going to – die: either expression is correct.

(1628 – 1702) French grammarian
Last words

I am off in search of the great perhaps.

(c.1494 – 1553) French Renaissance writer, doctor, monk & Greek scholar
Last words

Sex is like death… only after death you don’t feel like a pizza.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Death Food/Drink Sex

My mother buried three husbands, and two of them were just napping.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Death Husbands Mothers

I've arranged with my executor to be buried in Chicago, because when I die, I want to still remain active politically.

(1927 – ) Canadian-born American comedian & actor
Death Places Politics

It's stopped.

(1791 – 1863) English surgeon & literary executor of Samuel Taylor Coleridge
Last words

You got me.

(1903 – 1934) American bank robber & convicted murderer
Last words

Capital punishment turns the state into a murderer.; but imprisonment turns the state into a gay dungeon-master.

(1956 – ) American comedian
Death People

I told my girlfriend when I was going to die, because my birth certificate had an expiration date on it.

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Death

George W. [Bush] was born on third, but thinks he hit a triple.

(1943 – ) U.S. agriculture commissioner, columnist, activist & author
Death Insults

This is on me.

(1893 – 1967) writer, humorist & poet
Death

Mozart! Mozart!

(1860 – 1911) Austrian composer
Last words

Where there’s a will – there’s a relative!

(1961 – ) English comedian, actor, director, producer & writer
Death Family

I didn't know he was dead; I thought he was British.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Death People Places

My grandmother buried three husbands… and two of them were only napping.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Death Husbands Marriage Relationships

One last drink, please.

(1846 – 1911) American distiller
Last words

How were the receipts today at Madison Square Garden?

(1810 – 1891) American showman, businessman, entertainer & circus founder
Last words

Lady, you shot me.

(1931 – 1964) American singer, songwriter & entrepreneur
Last words

If this is dying, I don’t think much of it.

(1880 – 1932) British writer & critic
Death

Remember, today could just as easily be the LAST day of the rest of your life.

David Gerrold (1944 – ) science fiction author
Death Time

Death: A breath-taking experience.

Death Definitions