Subject: Death (Page 9)

Grave: A place in which the dead are laid to await the coming of the medical student.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Death Definitions

It is better to live rich than to die rich.

(1709 – 1784) English author, essayist, critic, editor & lexicographer
Death Life Money Poverty Wealth

I'm sorry, boys, I’m all wet.

(1895 – 1964) comedian (wife & partner of George Burns)
Death Last words

The show which, alas, every actor has to miss is his own memorial service.

(1908 – 1992) English actor
Death Entertainment

You know how you're going to die, you just don't know when.

comedian
Activities Death Places

The grass is brown on both sides of the fence.

Death Murphy’s Laws

Leave the shower curtain on the inside of the tub.

(1887 – 1979) American businessman & founder of the Hilton Hotels
Last words

On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done just as easily lying down.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Death

This isn't Hamlet, you know. It's not meant to go into the bloody ear.

(1907 – 1989) English actor, director & producer
Last words

Time: That which man is always trying to kill, but which ends in killing him.

(1820 – 1903) English philosopher
Death Time

Martyr: One who moves along the line of least reluctance to a desired death.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Death Definitions Language

There is only one thing in life worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Communication Death Speech

The wages of sin is death – but the working conditions are good.

Death Proverbs

How were the receipts today at Madison Square Garden?

(1810 – 1891) American showman, businessman, entertainer & circus founder
Last words

There is no such thing as inner peace; there is only nervousness and death.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Death

Utter nonsense.

(1884 – 1962) diplomat & reformer & first lady
Last words

The only completely consistent people are the dead.

(1894 – 1963) English writer
Death People

On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero.

(1962 – ) writer & journalist
Death People Time

He died of cirrhosis of the liver… it costs money to die of cirrhosis of the liver.

(1881 – 1975) English writer & humorist
Death Health Money

The key here, I think, is to not think of death as an end. But, to think of it more as a very effective way of cutting down on your expenses.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Death

A redneck died and left his entire fortune to his beloved wife… she couldn’t touch it until she was fourteen.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Death Marriage People Rednecks