Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
Home
About
Categories
Activities
Age
Animals
Appearance
Beliefs
Characteristics
Communication
Conflict
Death
Education
Emotions
Entertainment
Family
Food/Drink
Government
Health
Intelligence
Life
Marriage
Miscellaneous
Money
People
Places
Problems
Relationships
Science/Weather
Sex
Situations
Sports
Success
Things
Time
Work
Additional Categories
Book Titles
Confucius say
Definitions
Epitaphs
Exaggerations
Expressions
Hollywood Squares
Insults
Last Words
Murphy's Laws
Place Names
Proverbs
Reviews/Criticism
Song Titles
Tom Swifties
TV/Movie Quotes
Oops...
Bushisms
Church Bulletins
Classified Ads
Colemanballs
Headlines
Malaprops
Misspokements
Signs
Translations
Yogi-isms
Some Popular Authors
Abraham Lincoln
Alfred E. Neuman
Ambrose Bierce
Benjamin Franklin
Dave Barry
Demetri Martin
Dorothy Parker
Emo Phillips
George Carlin
Groucho Marx
H.L. Mencken
Homer Simpson
Jeff Foxworthy
Jimmy Carr
Joan Rivers
Mae West
Mark Twain
Mitch Hedberg
Oscar Wilde
Phyllis Diller
Richard Lewis
Rita Rudner
Rodney Dangerfield
Steven Wright
Stewart Francis
W.C. Fields
Will Rogers
Woody Allen
View All Authors
Subject:
Definitions
(Page 18)
View All Definitions
Yogurt: Semi-solid dairy product made from partially evaporated and fermented milk. Yogurt is one of only three foods that taste exactly the same as they sound. The other two being goulash and squid.
Anonymous
Definitions
Food/Drink
Yogurt
Puritan: A person who pours righteous indignation into the wrong things.
Anonymous
Definitions
Puritan
Censor: A person who sticks his
noes
into other people’s business.
Anonymous
Definitions
Censor
Apologize: To lay the foundation for a future offense.
Anonymous
Definitions
Apologize
Parole: A period at the end of a sentence.
Anonymous
Definitions
Parole
Distant Relative: One who can be very distant – especially when he has lots of money.
Anonymous
Definitions
Family
Distant Relative
Horse: An oatsmobile.
Anonymous
Animals
Definitions
Horse
Teenagers: People who express a burning drive to be different by dressing alike.
Anonymous
Age
Definitions
Teenagers
Brothel: Home is where the tart is.
Anonymous
Definitions
Brothel
B Flat: An apiary.
Anonymous
Definitions
Bees
Capitol: The seat of misgovernment.
Ambrose Bierce
(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Definitions
Government
Capitol
Cabinet Maker: Counter fitter.
Anonymous
Definitions
Occupations
Cabinet maker
Adolescence: When a boy has reached the state when he knows why a strapless gown must be held up, but doesn’t understand how.
Anonymous
Age
Definitions
Adolescence
Mercy: An attribute beloved of detected offenders.
Ambrose Bierce
(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Characteristics
Communication
Definitions
Language
Mercy
Chiropodist: A man who makes money hand over foot.
Anonymous
Definitions
Doctors
Occupations
Chiropodist
False Pregnancy: Laboring under a misconception.
Anonymous
Definitions
False pregnancy
Temptation: Something which, when resisted, gives happiness and which, when yielded to, gives even greater happiness.
Anonymous
Definitions
Temptation
Freudian Slip: Foot-in-mouth disease.
Anonymous
Communication
Definitions
Freudian Slip
Golf: A long walk broken up by disappointment and bad arithmetic.
Anonymous
Definitions
Golf
Sports
Y Chromosome: A line of genes designed for men only.
Anonymous
Definitions
Men
People
Y Chromosome
Friends: There are two kinds of friends – those who are around when you need them, and those who are around when they need you.
Anonymous
Definitions
Friends
People
Page 18 of 78
« First
« Previous
16
17
18
19
20
Next »
Last »