Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Definitions
(Page 18)
View All Definitions
Alliance: In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other’s pockets that hey cannot separately plunder a third.
Anonymous
Definitions
Politics
Alliance
Diaper: A changeable seat cover.
Anonymous
Definitions
Diaper
Baby: An inhabitant of Lapland.
Anonymous
Children
Definitions
Family
Babies
Consultant: A jobless person who shows executives how to work.
Rick Bayan
(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions
Work
Consultant
Executive: A big gun – that hasn’t been fired yet.
Anonymous
Definitions
Executive
Waffle: A pancake with a nonskid tread.
Anonymous
Definitions
Food/Drink
Waffle
Orgasm: The punchline some women just don’t get, generally because their mates have a tendency to rush through the joke.
Rick Bayan
(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions
Sex
Orgasm
Baker: A person who kneads the dough.
Anonymous
Definitions
Occupations
Baker
Reconsider: To seek a justification for a decision already made.
Ambrose Bierce
(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Definitions
Intelligence
Thinking
Reconsider
Below: Sing Bass.
Anonymous
Definitions
Below
Sarong: A simple garment carrying the implicit promise that it will not long stay in place.
Anonymous
Appearance
Clothing
Definitions
Sarong
Groom: Least important member of wedding party, whose only duties are to show up on time, remember the ring, and try not to be drunk.
Anonymous
Definitions
Husbands
Marriage
Groom
Amusement Park: A walled city populated mainly by teenagers, who willingly pay to have their bodies and brains agitated on a variety of fiendish contraptions designed to induce vomiting.
Anonymous
Definitions
Amusement Park
Bureaucrat: A Democrat who holds an office that a Republican wants.
Anonymous
Definitions
Government
Politicians
Bureaucrat
Civilization: A process whereby one generation finds the questions to the previous generation’s answers.
Anonymous
Definitions
Civilization
Booby Trap: A brassiere.
Anonymous
Definitions
Booby Trap
Alimony: The fee a woman charges for name-dropping.
Anonymous
Definitions
Marriage
Alimony
Family Planning: The art of spacing your children the proper distance apart to keep you on the edge of financial disaster.
Anonymous
Children
Definitions
Family
Family Planning
Immorality: The morality of those who are having a better time.
Anonymous
Definitions
Immorality
Caffeine: One of the four basic food groups.
Anonymous
Definitions
Food/Drink
Caffeine
Cantaloupe: Gotta get married in a church.
Anonymous
Definitions
Marriage
Cantaloupe
Page 18 of 78
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