Subject: Definitions (Page 19)

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Vacuum Cleaner: A sonic broom.

Definitions Things

Desertion: The poor man’s divorce.

Definitions Divorce Marriage

Alibi: Slip cover.

Definitions

Diploma: A job-hunting license.

Definitions

Intuition: The strange instinct that tells a woman she is right whether she is or not.

Definitions Women

Revolution: An abrupt change in the form of misgovernment.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Conflict Definitions Government

Life: A continuous series of disasters which result in one’s death.

Death Definitions Life

Desire: The thing that is so often nipped in the budget.

Definitions Emotions

Fine Print: A clause for suspicion.

Definitions

Painting: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather and exposing them to the critic.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Art Definitions

Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich by promising to protect each from the other.

(1870-1943) German-American politician, socialist & writer
Definitions Government Politics

Love: A form of self-government under a two-party system.

Definitions Emotions Love

Saint: A dead sinner, revised and edited.

Definitions People

Ecstasy: Happiness with its clothes off.

Definitions Emotions Happiness Sex

Organic Farm: Tilling like it is.

Definitions

Advertising: The rattling of a stick inside a swill bucket.

Eric Arthur Blair (1903 – 50) English author & journalist
Definitions

Husband: A person who is the boss of his house and has his wife’s permission to say so.

Definitions Husbands Marriage

Shoplifter: A person with a gift of grab.

Conflict Crime Definitions

Patience: A minor form of despair, disguised as a virtue.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Characteristics Communication Definitions Language

Grass: The green stuff that wilts in the yard and flourishes in the garden.

Definitions

Nepotism: Putting on heirs.

Definitions Family