Subject: Definitions (Page 22)

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Age: The time when everything hurts and what doesn’t hurt, doesn’t work.

Age Definitions Old

Numismatics: Collecting money for fun.

Definitions

Boss: A personal dictator appointed to those of us fortunate enough to live in free societies.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions Work

Cheerfulness: The art of concealing your true feelings.

Definitions Emotions Happiness

Youth: That brief period, as distinguished from childhood or middle age, when the sexes talk to each other at a party.

Age Definitions People Young

Group Therapy: A drama-in-the-round staged for the entertainment of a professional therapist, who commands the players to put on a new show each week and charges them for the privilege.

Definitions

Fanatic: One who, having lost sight of his goal, redoubles his efforts.

Definitions People

Carpet: A floor covering that is bought by the yard and worn by the foot.

Definitions

Desk: A dangerous place from which to view the world.

Definitions

Double Jeopardy: When your doctor calls in a consulting physician.

Definitions Doctors Health

Honeymoon: The vacation a man takes before starting to work for a new boss.

Definitions Marriage

Punctuality: Waiting around for other people.

Definitions

Friend: A person who listens attentively while you say nothing.

Definitions Friends People

Ambulance: A vehicle used to show lawyers where the accident is.

Definitions

Antique: Something too old to be anything but too expensive.

Definitions Things

Recollect: To recall with additions something not previously known.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Definitions Memory

Armor: The kind of clothing worn by a man whose tailor is a blacksmith.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Clothing Communication Definitions Language

Rum: Generically, fiery liquors that produce madness in total abstainers.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Alcohol Definitions

Liberal: A man with his mind open at both ends.

Beliefs Definitions People

Tube Dress: A dress which is an extended boob tube.

Clothing Definitions

Genetic Engineering: Tampering with chromosomes so that science might develop a new miracle cure or a rabbit that plays the banjo. –

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions Science/Weather