Subject: Definitions (Page 26)

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Procrastination: The art of keeping up with yesterday.

Definitions

Delaware: A state that has three counties when the tide is out, and two when it is in.

(1833 – 1900) American politician
Definitions

Trombones: Bones in an orchestra.

Definitions

Boat: A hole in the water surrounded by wood into which one pours money.

Definitions Things

Unemployment: The usual alternative to overwork.

Definitions Work

My definition of a redundancy is an air bag in a politician's car.

(1931– 2012) American actor, producer & director
Definitions Government Politicians

Compromise: An amiable arrangement between husband and wife whereby they agree to let her have her own way.

Definitions Marriage

Heckler: A guy who ribs you the wrong way.

Definitions Wordplay

Passport: A document treacherously inflicted upon a citizen going abroad, exposing him as an alien and pointing him out for special reprobation and outrage.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Activities Definitions Individuals Things Travel

Tomorrow: What always comes but never arrives.

Definitions Future Time

Cannibal: Someone who is fed up with people.

Definitions

Quartet: Four men, all of whom think that the other three can’t sing.

Definitions Entertainment

Intimacy: The first step toward parenthood.

Definitions

Automatic: If something is automatic, that simple means that you can’t repair it yourself.

Definitions Murphy’s Laws Problems

Miser: A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.

Definitions Money

Liberal: A man with his mind open at both ends.

Beliefs Definitions People

Ventriloquist: A man with a dummy who always talks to himself.

Definitions

Avoidance: A dance for people who hate each other.

Definitions

Bore: A person who has nothing to say and says it.

Definitions

Barometer: An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having.

Definitions Science/Weather

Income: The sum of money which it costs more than to live.

Definitions Money