Subject: Definitions (Page 32)

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Bimbo: Any woman to whom you pay a compliment, while in the company of your wife.

Definitions Women

Accordion: A pleated bagpipe.

Definitions Entertainment Music Things

Alimony: Bounty after the mutiny.

typographer
Definitions Marriage

Puttering: Woman’s word for man’s work.

Definitions

Sinker: Lead weight attached to the end of a length of fishing line to facilitate the speedy disposal of unwanted lures.

Activities Definitions Things

Sympathy: What one usually gives to a friend or relative when he doesn’t want to lend him money.

Definitions Emotions

Wisdom: Knowing when to speak your mind and when to mind your speech.

Definitions Intelligence Wisdom

Accountant: Someone hired to explain that you didn’t make the money you did.

Definitions Occupations

Bathing Suit: A garment cut to see level.

Appearance Clothing Definitions Wordplay

College: A fountain of knowledge where students gather to drink.

Definitions Education School

Artichoke: The only vegetable you have more of when you finish eating it, than you had when you started.

Definitions

Colleague: The person to whom one passes the buck.

Definitions

Antiques: Furniture that is too old for poor folks but the right age for rich people.

Definitions

Statistician: Someone who is good with numbers, but lacks the personality to be an accountant.

Definitions Occupations Work

Gimme: An agreement between two duffer golfers who can’t putt.

Definitions Golf Sports

Parole: A period at the end of a sentence.

Definitions

Gifted Children: Unfortunate tykes who lack the good sense to hide their talents from overly ambitious parents.

Definitions Family

Telephone: A contrivance for letting us talk to people whom we don’t want to meet.

Definitions Things

Etiquette: A convenient code of conduct which makes lying a virtue and snobbishness a righteous deed.

Definitions

Newspaper: A publication that condemns gambling and promotes lottery numbers.

Definitions

Anatomy: The belly of a very small insect.

Definitions Wordplay