Subject: Definitions (Page 39)

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Television: A means of getting a babysitter so Mom and Dad can get out to the movies.

Definitions Entertainment Television

Riot: A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Conflict Definitions

Vuja de: The feeling you've never been here.

Definitions

Pediatrician: Man of little patients.

Definitions Doctors Health Wordplay

Small Town: A place where everybody knows the troubles you’ve seen.

Definitions Places

Insanity: Knowing that what you’re doing is completely idiotic, but still, somehow, you just can’t stop it.

Definitions

College: A fountain of knowledge where students gather to drink.

Definitions Education School

Woman: A creature who is either making a fool out of man, or making a man out of a fool.

Definitions People

Confidence: What you have before you understand the problem.

Definitions

Redneck: Popular term for a rustic male, but rarely employed when addressing one in person.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions People

Choir: A group of people whose singing allows the rest of the Congregation to lip-sync.

Definitions

Impregnable: A woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.

Definitions Sex

Igloo: An icicle built for two.

Definitions

Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

Definitions

Newlywed: What you and your spouse will officially be considered until your first anniversary, or until you go an entire week without sex (whichever comes first).

Definitions Marriage

Traffic Light: A trick to get pedestrians halfway across the street safely.

Autos Definitions Things

Honest Politician: One who, when he is bought, will stay bought.

Definitions Government Politicians

Harp: A piano in the nude.

Definitions Entertainment Music Things

Consultation: A medical term meaning “share the wealth.”

Definitions

Cynic: A man who sees things as they are, not as they ought to be.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language

Detour: The roughest distance between two points.

Activities Definitions Travel