Subject: Definitions (Page 5)

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Wedding Ring: A one-man band.

Definitions Marriage

Heir Cut: Disinheritance.

Definitions

Forger: The man who gives a check a bad name.

Definitions

Nouvelle Cuisine, roughly translated, means: I can’t believe I paid ninety-six dollars and I’m still hungry.

Cooking Definitions Food/Drink

Dieting: The penalty for exceeding the feed limit.

Definitions Food/Drink

Hors d'oeuvres: A sandwich cut into 20 pieces.

Definitions Food/Drink

Philosophers: People who talk about something they don’t understand, and make you think it’s your fault.

Definitions Intelligence People

Tabloid: A screamlined newspaper.

Communication Definitions Reading/Writing

University: A modern school where football is taught.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Education Football Language School

Lawsuit: A contest generally won by the party that can afford to reimburse the lawyers on both sides of the dispute.

Definitions Law Lawyers

Spanking: To impress upon the mind from the bottom up.

Definitions

Alphabet: A toy for children found in books, blocks, pictures, and some soup.

Communication Definitions Language

Puttering: Woman’s word for man’s work.

Definitions

Strip Teaser: One who makes a bare living.

Body Definitions Occupations

Discretion: A sense that comes to a man too late to do him any good.

Definitions

Good Old Days: A block of time which ended a week before you were hired.

Definitions Past Time Work

Inhibition: Being tied up in nots.

Definitions

Altar: Place where a man loses control of himself.

Definitions Marriage

Coward: One who in a perilous emergency thinks with his legs.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language

Liberal: A man with his mind open at both ends.

Beliefs Definitions People

Heredity: What a man believes in until his son begins to behave like a delinquent.

Definitions Family