Subject: Definitions (Page 50)

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Intelligent conversationalist: One who nods his head in agreement while you’re talking.

Communication Conversation Definitions Intelligence Speech

Grave: A place in which the dead are laid to await the coming of the medical student.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Death Definitions

Great American: What speakers call a man when they can’t think of anything specifically complimentary to say.

Definitions

Budget: An orderly system of living beyond your means.

Definitions

Year: A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Definitions Time

Bad Driver: The person you run into.

Autos Definitions Things

Acquaintance: A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Individuals Language Money

Casserole: A method used by ingenious cooks to get rid of leftovers.

Definitions Food/Drink

Statesman: A politician away from home.

Definitions Politicians

Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

Definitions

Lawsuit: A contest generally won by the party that can afford to reimburse the lawyers on both sides of the dispute.

Definitions Law Lawyers

Suburbia: Where they tear out the trees and then name streets after them.

Definitions Places

Window Dresser: A girl who doesn’t pull down the shades.

Definitions People

Agreeable Person: One who agrees with me.

Definitions

Fishing: A jerk at one end of the line waiting for a jerk at the other end.

Activities Definitions

Cookie: A standard method for converting sugar, floor, and butter into body fat.

Definitions Food/Drink

Cartoon: What’s sung when driving your car.

Definitions

Laziness: The habit of resting before you get tired.

Characteristics Definitions

Queen: A woman by whom the realm is ruled when there is a king, and through whom it is ruled when there is not.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Definitions Government People

Peeping Tom: A window fan.

Definitions Wordplay

Barber: A brilliant conversationalist who cuts hair for a sideline.

Conversation Definitions Occupations