Subject: Definitions (Page 51)

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Quadruplets: Four crying out loud.

Children Definitions Wordplay

Keyboard: The standard way to generate computer errors.

Computers Definitions Things

Self-evident: Evident to one's self and to nobody else.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Beliefs Definitions

Venereal Disease: Germs of endearment.

Definitions Health

Chauffeur: A man who is smart enough to operate an automobile, but clever enough not to own one.

Autos Definitions Things

Life: A play with a lousy third act.

Definitions Life

Courtship: A period during which a girl decides whether or not she can do better.

Definitions Relationships

Communist: A guy who borrows your pot to cook your goose.

Definitions

Youth: The first fifty years of your life… the first twenty of anyone else’s.

Age Definitions Young

Dollar: The jack of all trades.

Definitions

Consolation: The knowledge that a better man is more unfortunate than yourself.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language

Shakespeare: A man whose writings are so excellent it’s believed someone else must have written them.

Definitions

Egotist: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

Definitions

Auditor: A person who goes in after the war is lost to bayonet the wounded.

Definitions Occupations

Architect: One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money.

Definitions Occupations

Sinker: Lead weight attached to the end of a length of fishing line to facilitate the speedy disposal of unwanted lures.

Activities Definitions Things

Experience : The name men give to their mistakes.

Definitions Mistakes

Adolescents: People who never seem to realize that one day they will be as dumb as their parents.

Age Definitions

Communism: The cause that suppresses.

Definitions

Taxi Driver: Worker who earns a living by driving customers away.

Definitions Occupations

Honeymoon: A short period of doting between dating and debting.

Definitions Marriage