Subject: Definitions (Page 56)

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A conservative is a man who is too cowardly to fight and too fat to run.

(1856 – 1915) writer, publisher, artist & philosopher
Beliefs Definitions People

B Flat: An apiary.

Definitions

Yawn: Opening one’s mouth and wishing that others would close theirs.

Definitions

Darling: The popular form of address used in speaking to a member of the opposite sex whose name you cannot at the moment remember.

(1863 – 1935) British-born American writer, artist & illustrator
Definitions

Civilization: A process whereby one generation finds the questions to the previous generation’s answers.

Definitions

Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.

Definitions Science/Weather Taxes

Mercy: An attribute beloved of detected offenders.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Characteristics Communication Definitions Language

Yacht: A floating debt.

Definitions

Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

(1952 – 2001) English writer, dramatist, & musician
Activities Definitions

Parking Space: An unfilled opening in an unending line of cars near an unapproachable fire hydrant.

Definitions

Adherent: A follower who has not yet obtained all that he expects to get.

Definitions People

Anesthetic: The painkiller that crazy women refuse during labor.

Definitions

Sport: War without killing.

Definitions

Argument: An exchange of ignorance.

Definitions

Egotist: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

Definitions

Neighbors: The strangers who live next door.

Definitions People

Antique: An item your grandparents bought, your parents got rid of,  and you're buying again.

Definitions Things

Apologize: To repeat an insult with variations.

Definitions

Oyster: A person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish expressions.

Definitions

Punctuality: The art of guessing correctly how late the other party is going to be.

Definitions Time

Venereal Disease: Germs of endearment.

Definitions Health