Subject: Definitions (Page 59)

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Fable: A story told by a teenager arriving home after curfew.

Definitions

Chastity: Perhaps the most peculiar of all sexual aberrations.

Definitions Sex

Dog: The only friend you can buy for money.

Animals Definitions Dogs

AAA-AA: A club for people who are being driven to drink.

Alcohol Definitions Food/Drink

Hypochondriac: Someone who enjoys bad health.

Definitions Health

Love: The triumph of imagination over intelligence.

Definitions Emotions Love

Gentleman Farmer: One who has more hay in the bank thank in the barn.

Definitions

Juvenile Delinquents: Other people’s children.

Definitions

Leftovers: Repast history.

Definitions Food/Drink

Youth: A good substitute for experience.

Age Definitions Young

Puritan: A person who pours righteous indignation into the wrong things.

Definitions

Neurotic: Someone who worries about things that didn’t happen in the past instead of worrying about things that won’t happen in the future.

Definitions People

Architect: One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language Money Things

Awe: Wow of silence.

Definitions

Middle Age: That period when a man begins to shed his hair, his teeth, and his illusions.

Age Definitions

Exaggeration: Formal term for a collection of fishermen (i.e. an exaggeration of anglers).

Activities Definitions Language

Dust: Mud with the juice squeezed out.

Definitions

Old Age: When you find yourself using one bend-over to pick up two things.

Age Definitions Old

Fortune teller: Séance fiction.

Definitions

Philosophy: Common sense in a dress suit.

Definitions Intelligence Wisdom

Friend: Someone who thinks you’re a good egg even though you’re slightly cracked.

Definitions Friends People