Subject: Definitions (Page 6)

View All Definitions

Brain: An apparatus with which we think we think.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Intelligence Language

Marriage: A process of finding out what sort of guy your wife would have preferred.

Definitions Marriage

Multitasking: Messing up several chores at the same time.

Activities Definitions

Hors d'oeuvres: A sandwich cut into 20 pieces.

Definitions Food/Drink

Y Chromosome: The cause of virility, war, baldness, hockey, sex crimes, clever inventions and a disinclination to ask for directions when lost.

Definitions Men

Taxation: The process by which money is collected from the people to pay the salaries of the men who do the collecting.

Definitions Government Taxes

Chatterbox: Another name for a telephone booth.

Definitions Things

Righteous Indignation: Your own wrath, as opposed to the shocking bad temper of others.

Anger Definitions Emotions

Announce: Thirty grams or a sixteenth of a pound.

Definitions Wordplay

Scotsman: A man who, before sending his pajamas to the laundry, stuffs a sock in each pocket.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Definitions Frugal Money People

Kiss: What the child gets free, the young man steals, and the old man buys.

Definitions

Flashlight: A case for storing dead batteries.

Definitions Things

Key Ring: A handy little gadget that allows you to lose all your keys at once.

Definitions Things

Taxidermist: A man who mounts animals.

Animals Definitions Occupations

Infant Prodigies: Young people with highly imaginative parents.

Children Definitions Family

Statesman: A politician who is held upright by equal pressure from all directions.

Definitions Politicians

Narcissist: Psychoanalytic term for the person who loves himself more than his analyst.

Definitions People Self

Statistics: The only science that enables different experts using the same figures to draw different conclusions.

Definitions Science/Weather

Advertising: The rattling of a stick inside a swill bucket.

Eric Arthur Blair (1903 – 50) English author & journalist
Definitions

Deterrence: The art of producing, in the mind of the enemy, the fear to attack.

Definitions

Consultant: A jobless person who shows executives how to work.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions Work