Subject: Definitions (Page 62)

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Courtship: A period during which a girl decides whether or not she can do better.

Definitions Relationships

Philanthropist: One who returns to the people publicly what he steals from them privately.

Definitions People

Youth: A good substitute for experience.

Age Definitions Young

Social Diseases: Germs of endearment.

Definitions

Clairvoyant: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron, namely, that he is a blockhead.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Communication Definitions Language

Communist: One who has yearnings for equal division of unequal earnings.

Definitions

History: An account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Definitions History Time

Hypochondriac: One who enjoys poor health, then complains of feeling better.

Definitions Health

Telephone: A contrivance for letting us talk to people whom we don’t want to meet.

Definitions Things

Hip: Smartly attuned to the latest cutting-edge cliches.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions

Neighbors: The only people who listen to both sides of an argument.

Definitions People

Clique: A group of insiders who greet outsiders with their backsides; a closed circle of asses.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions People

Desk: A dangerous place from which to view the world.

Definitions

Advice: Something which we give by the bushel but take by the grain.

Definitions

Char: Common method of cooking over a campfire.

Cooking Definitions

Cocktail party: A gathering held to enable forty people to talk about themselves at the same time; the man who remains after the liquor is gone is the host.

(1894 – 1956) American radio comedian
Activities Definitions

Reoriented: Sent back to China.

Definitions Wordplay

Sex: The formula by which one and one makes three.

Definitions Sex

Entrepreneur: What you’re called when you don’t have a job.

Definitions

Butt: The body part that every item of clothing makes “look bigger.”

Appearance Body Definitions

Free Verse: Verse written without rhyme or reason.

Definitions Reading/Writing