Subject: Definitions (Page 74)

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A man with two perfectly good legs who has never learned to walk.

(1882 – 1945) 32nd U.S. president
Definitions People

Niagara Falls: The bride’s second great disappointment.

Definitions Places Sex

Blind Date: When you expect to meet a vision and he turns out to be a sight.

Dating Definitions

Archbishop: An ecclesiastical dignitary one point holier than a bishop.

Definitions Religion

Flood: A river too big for its bridges.

Definitions

Fairway: The well-kept and seldom used portion of a golf course.

Definitions Golf Sports

Pessimist: Someone who burns their bridges before they get to them.

Definitions

Television Programming: Material that fills the time between commercials.

Definitions Entertainment

Matrimony: The splice of life.

Definitions Marriage Wordplay

Fiddler: A violinist before he becomes the virtuoso.

Definitions Entertainment Music

Historians: People who won’t let bygones be bygones.

Definitions History Occupations Time

Revolutionary: An oppressed person waiting for the opportunity to become an oppressor.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions

Destiny: A tyrant’s authority for crime and a fool’s excuse for failure.

Definitions Future Time

Accountability: The mother of caution.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Characteristics Definitions

Thrift: Common sense applied to spending.

Definitions Money

Experience: What you get from being inexperienced.

Definitions

Accrue: People who work on a ship.

Definitions

Honeymoon: A short period of doting between dating and debting.

Definitions Marriage

Ambassador: An honest man sent to lie abroad for the good of his country.

Definitions

Suntan: A pigment of your imagination.

Definitions

Tomorrow: One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.

Definitions Future Time