Subject: Definitions (Page 78)

View All Definitions

Plumber: A drain surgeon.

Definitions Occupations

Auctioneer: The man who proclaims with a hammer that he has picked a pocket with his tongue.

Definitions Occupations

Lawsuit: A contest generally won by the party that can afford to reimburse the lawyers on both sides of the dispute.

Definitions Law Lawyers

Opening night: The night before the play is ready to open.

(1882 – 1958) drama critic, editor
Definitions

Sadist: A person who is kind to a masochist.

Definitions People Wordplay

Gentleman Farmer: One who has more hay in the bank thank in the barn.

Definitions

Candidate: A person who asks for money from the wealthy and votes from the poor to protect them from each other.

Definitions Elections/Voting Government

Unemployment: The usual alternative to overwork.

Definitions Work

Ice Fishing: Winter fishing method in which anglers use a variety of specialized equipment to catch colds.

Definitions

Star: A performer who makes more than his or her agent.

(1950 – ) American author, satirist, webmaster & copywriter
Definitions