Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Definitions
(Page 9)
View All Definitions
Honeymoon: The morning after the knot before.
Anonymous
Communication
Definitions
Marriage
Honeymoons
Ventriloquist: A man who never speaks for himself.
Anonymous
Communication
Definitions
Speech
Ventriloquist
Boat: A hole in the water surrounded by wood into which one pours money.
Anonymous
Definitions
Things
Boat
Definition of a classic: a book everyone is assumed to have read and often thinks they have.
Alan Bennett
English author, actor, humorist & playwright
Books
Communication
Definitions
Reading/Writing
Classics
Chivalry: The attitude of a man toward somebody else’s wife.
Anonymous
Definitions
Chivalry
Adolescence: That period when children feel their parents should be told the facts of life.
Anonymous
Age
Definitions
Adolescence
Dermatologist: Person who makes rash judgments.
Anonymous
Definitions
Doctors
Health
Dermatologist
Good Old Days: What people fifty years hence will be calling the present time.
Anonymous
Definitions
Past
Time
Bus: A vehicle that runs faster when you run after it and runs slowly when you are inside it.
Anonymous
Definitions
Driving
Bus
Speed
Transportation
Yardstick: One foot on each side and one in the middle.
Anonymous
Definitions
Yardstick
Foot: A politician’s pacifier.
Anonymous
Definitions
Politicians
Foot
Poise: The act of raising the eyebrows instead of the roof.
Anonymous
Definitions
Poise
Buffet: A French word that means “get up and get it yourself.”
Ron Dentinger
American humorist & public speaker
Definitions
Food/Drink
Buffet
Lecher: A stud with liver spots.
Anonymous
Definitions
Lecher
Groom: Least important member of wedding party, whose only duties are to show up on time, remember the ring, and try not to be drunk.
Anonymous
Definitions
Husbands
Marriage
Groom
Filing Cabinet: A place where you lose things alphabetically.
Anonymous
Definitions
Filing Cabinet
Modesty: Being comfortable that others will soon discover your greatness.
Anonymous
Definitions
Self
Modesty
Hole-In-One: An occurrence in which a ball is hit directly from the tee into the hole on a single shot by a golfer playing alone.
Anonymous
Definitions
Golf
Sports
Hole-in-one
Fortune teller: Séance fiction.
Anonymous
Definitions
Fortune teller
Blind Date: When you expect to meet a vision and he turns out to be a sight.
Anonymous
Dating
Definitions
Relationships
Blind Date
Intelligent conversationalist: One who nods his head in agreement while you’re talking.
Anonymous
Communication
Conversation
Definitions
Intelligence
Speech
Agreement
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