Subject: Education » Learning

If, while you are in school, there is a shortage of qualified personnel in a particular field, then by the time you graduate with the necessary qualifications, that field's employment is glutted.


Education Learning Murphy’s Laws School

I quit school in the sixth grade because of pneumonia; not because I had it, but because I couldn’t spell it.


(1919 – 1990) American boxing champion
Education Health Learning School

When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around; but when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Family Fathers Intelligence Learning Stupidity Wisdom

Never let your studies interfere with your education.

Education Learning Murphy’s Laws School

Genitals are a great distraction to scholarship.

(1932 – 2000) English author & academic
Education Learning Sex

If we really learned from our past mistakes, most of us would never get out of bed in the morning.

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Education History Learning Mistakes

You're looking at a very proud Canadian who is very proud of the educational system in Canadia…

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Canada Communication Education Learning Places Reading/Writing

Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra; in real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Education Learning Life Science/Weather

You live and learn… at any rate, you live.

(1952 – 2001) English writer, dramatist, & musician
Education Learning Life

Dad taught me everything I know; unfortunately, he didn’t teach me everything he knows.

(1962 – ) American race car driver
Education Family Fathers Learning

Learning to ignore things is one of the great paths to inner peace.


Education Learning

Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student; at least they can find Kuwait.

(1952 – ) American writer & comedian
Education Intelligence Learning

A child can be taught not to do certain things, such as touch a hot stove, pull lamps off of tables, and wake Mommy before noon.

(1935 – 2014) American comedian, television personality, writer & director
Children Family Learning

Every child has a right to go to high school and end up with a third grade education.

(1927 – 1997) Am. comedian & satirist notable for mock presidential campaign
Children Education Learning School

To learn that all I really need to know I learned in kindergarten, I needed to go to grad school.


Education Learning

Learn of the skillful; he that teaches himself, has a fool for his master.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Education Learning

If we keep on learning at this rate well soon know nothing at all.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Education Learning

Ah, well… we live and learn, or, anyway, we live.

(1884 – 1949) American humorist & literary critic
Death Education Learning

I took a positive thinking course… it was shit.

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
Education Learning

Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your mouth is moving.

Communication Education Learning Speech

Education is what survives when what has been learnt has been forgotten.

Education Learning Memory