Subject: Education (Page 12)

Teacher: A person who swore she would starve before teaching, and who has been doing both ever since.

Definitions Education

Education: What you have left over when you subtract what you’ve forgotten from what you learned.

Definitions Education

You might be a redneck if… you refer to the fifth grade as “my senior year.”

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Education People Rednecks School

When reviewing your notes before an exam, the most important will be illegible.

Education Murphy’s Laws Reading/Writing School

Graduate School: The place where a young scholar goes off his Dad’s payroll – and on to his wife’s.

Definitions Education School

It seems to be a law in American life that whatever enriches us anywhere except in the wallet inevitably becomes uneconomic.

(1925 – ) columnist & journalist
Education Entertainment Money

As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.

Education Religion School

A lot of fellows nowadays have a B.A., M.D., or Ph.D. – unfortunately, they don’t have a J.O.B.

(1928 – ) American R&B and rock & roll singer-songwriter
Education Occupations School Work

Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra; in real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

(1950 – ) writer & humorist
Education Learning Life Science/Weather

Trying to give my kids an education in Los Angeles is a nightmare with the guns, the gangs, the drugs – and I'm home schooling them.

American comedian & writer
Conflict Drugs Education Places

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.

Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Education School

A lot of people think kids say the darnedest things, but so would you if you had no education.

(1974 – ) Russian-born American comedian, writer & filmmaker
Children Communication Education Family Speech

Our school color was manila.

comedian
Education School

For every person wishing to teach, there are thirty not wanting to be taught.

(1898 – 1951) Scottish humorist
Education Learning

If lessons are learned in defeat, as they say, our team is really getting a great education.

American football coach
Education Football Sports

Never let your studies interfere with your education.

Education Learning Murphy’s Laws School

If what you don't know can't hurt you, she's practically invulnerable.

Education Insults

You might be a redneck if… your school fight song is Dueling Banjos.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
People Rednecks School

Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your mouth is moving.

Communication Education Learning Speech

If you’re studying Geology, which is all facts, as soon as you get out of school you forget it all, but Philosophy you remember just enough to screw you up for the rest of your life.

(1945 – ) comedian, actor, writer, playwright & musician
Education Learning

You're looking at a very proud Canadian who is very proud of the educational system in Canadia…

Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Canada Communication Education Learning Places Reading/Writing