Subject: Education » School (Page 2)

If, while you are in school, there is a shortage of qualified personnel in a particular field, then by the time you graduate with the necessary qualifications, that field's employment is glutted.


Education Learning Murphy’s Laws School

A school without football is in danger of deteriorating into a medieval study hall.

American football coach
Activities Education Football Misspokements School Sports

College: A fountain of knowledge where students gather to drink.

Definitions Education School

Colleges are like old-age homes, except for the fact that more people die in colleges.

(1941 – ) American singer & songwriter
Death Education School

I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back.

(1894 – 1956) American radio comedian
Education Law Money School

I hated Geography… because it’s just like History… except without people and dates.

(1956 – ) American entertainer & comedian
Education History School Time

80% of the final exam will be based on the one lecture you missed and the one book you didn't read.

Education Murphy’s Laws School

I have never been jealous; not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Characteristics Education Fathers School

I quit school in the sixth grade because of pneumonia; not because I had it, but because I couldn’t spell it.


(1919 – 1990) American boxing champion
Education Health Learning School

You might be a redneck if… your dad walks you to school because you’re in the same grade.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Education Family Fathers People Rednecks School

I was thinkin' maybe we should just bomb ourselves so we could upgrade our school system.

(1961 – ) comedian, writer, radio & television personality & blogger
Conflict Education School War

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage.

(1919 – 1991) American comedian & actor
Education Marriage School

Absolute Zero: The lowest grade attainable on a test.

Definitions Education School

We all learn by experience, but some of us have to go to summer school.

(1910 – 1993) editor & novelist
Education Learning Life School

Our school color was manila.

comedian
Education School

I had a terrible education… I attended a school for emotionally disturbed teachers.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Education School

 I want a school my football team can be proud of.

(1905 – 1998) botanist, author & University of Oklahoma president
Education Football Misspokements School Sports

My recipe for bad grades: don't study.

(1964 – ) American stand-up comedian, actor & voice actor
Education School

If I drop out of school, where am I gonna find drugs?

Palestinian/American comedian
Activities Drugs School Situations

Don’t marry a man to reform him; that’s what reform schools are for.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Marriage Men School

You might be a redneck if… you refer to the fifth grade as “my senior year.”

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Education People Rednecks School