Subject: Education » School (Page 5)

In school, every period ends with a bell… every sentence ends with a period… every crime ends with a sentence.


Education School

I spent three of the happiest years of my life in the fifth grade.

(1895 – 1964) comedian (wife & partner of George Burns)
Education School TV/Movie Quotes

Interviewer: Did you graduate from Auburn?
Charles: No, but I have a couple people working for me who did.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Basketball Education School Sports

Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything one learned in school.

(1879 – 1955) German-born physicist
Education Learning Memory School

As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in schools.

Education School

He is so old… when he was in school they didn’t teach history!

Age Education Exaggerations Old School

Can’t anything be done about calling these guys student athletes? … That’s like referring to Attila the Hun’s cavalry as “weekend warriors.”

(1925 – ) columnist & journalist
Education People School Sports

Economists report that a college education adds many thousands of dollars to a man's lifetime income… which he then spends sending his son to college.

(1915 – 1977) columnist, writer & actor
Education Money School

I believe that we parents must encourage our children to become educated, so they can get into a good college that we cannot afford.

(1947 – ) American columnist & humorist
Education Money School

I hated Geography… because it’s just like History… except without people and dates.

(1956 – ) American entertainer & comedian
Education History School Time

University: A college with a stadium seating more than sixty thousand.

Definitions Education School

A school without football is in danger of deteriorating into a medieval study hall.

American football coach
Activities Education Football Misspokements School Sports

If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book.

Education Murphy’s Laws School

If law school is so hard to get through… how come there are so many lawyers?

(1935 – ) columnist, journalist & novelist
Education Government Law Lawyers School

In our school you were searched for guns and knifes on the way in and if you didn’t have any, they gave you some.

(1956 – ) American comedian
Arms Conflict Education School

I have never been jealous; not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Characteristics Education Fathers School

My school was so tough the school newspaper had an obituary section.

(1927 – ) American comedian
Education School

I went to medical school here at Columbia; I got my M.D.; and was practicing out in Colorado, where I decided to quit and do stand-up – and not just because of the lawsuits.

(1971 – ) American comedian, actor, television host & former physician
Doctors Education Health Law School

Every child has a right to go to high school and end up with a third grade education.

(1927 – 1997) Am. comedian & satirist notable for mock presidential campaign
Children Education Learning School

If school had started at 4:00 in the afternoon, I'd be a college graduate today.

(1949 – ) American boxing champion
Boxing Education School Sports

I was thinkin' maybe we should just bomb ourselves so we could upgrade our school system.

(1961 – ) comedian, writer, radio & television personality & blogger
Conflict Education School War