Subject: Emotions (Page 2)

My grief counsellor died the other day… but he was so good I didn’t give a shit.

(1973 – ) English writer & stand-up comedian
Death Emotions

Dealing with joy sometimes is more difficult than overcoming adversity if you enjoy self-loathng as a hobby.

(1947 – ) comedian & actor
Emotions

There’s no such thing as fun for the whole family.

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor
Emotions Family Happiness

Love’s like the measles… all the worse when it comes late in life.

(1803 – 1857) English writer
Emotions Love

Farmers only worry during the growing season, but townspeople worry all the time.

(1853 – 1937) journalist, writer & editor
Emotions

All men are afraid of eyelash curlers; I sleep with one under my pillow, instead of a gun.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Arms Fear Men People Things

I used to be afraid of relationships; someone would ask me out and I'd say, 'Just take my purse, don't hurt me!'

(1970 – ) American stand-up comedian & voice actor
Dating Fear Relationships

No matter how love-sick a woman is, she shouldn't take the first pill that comes along.

(1928 – ) American psychologist & advice columnist
Emotions Love Men People

I know what love is ‘cuz’ I watch talk shows… love is the end of happiness!

(1944 – ) American actor, director & producer
Emotions Love TV/Movie Quotes

Humor is merely tragedy standing on its head with its pants torn.

(1876 – 1944) American author, humorist & columnist
Communication Emotions Situations

The only really happy folk are married women and single men.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Happiness

My grandfather used to make home movies and edit out the joy.

(1947 – ) comedian & actor
Emotions Happiness

A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of.

(1775 – 1817) English novelist
Emotions Happiness Money

Life is a tragedy when seen in close-up, but a comedy in long-shot.

(1889 – 1977) English comedian, actor & film director
Emotions Entertainment Film Life

If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke?


Emotions Situations

Love and marriage go together like angel cake and anthrax.

(1959 – ) English writer & columnist
Emotions Love Marriage

Bush gave an interview and he said people will vote for him because 'They've seen me weep, they’ve seen me laugh, and they’ve seen me hug – the same qualifications for a Tickle Me Elmo.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Elections/Voting Emotions Government

Every man is thoroughly happy twice in his life: just after he has met his first love, and just after he has left his last one.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Emotions Happiness Love

I get those maternal feelings; like when I’m laying on the couch and I can’t reach the remote control.

(1965 – ) American comedian
Children Emotions Family

After 12 years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes… he said, "No hablo Ingles."

comedian
Emotions

Falling in love consists merely in uncorking the imagination and bottling the common sense.

(1876 – 1950) journalist & humorist
Emotions Intelligence Love