Subject: Emotions (Page 20)

My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem… but they don’t really know me.

(1949 – 2016) American comedian & television actor
Emotions

Reality is the leading cause of stress amongst those in touch with it.

(1935 – ) screenwriter, author, director & producer
Emotions Intelligence

He who laughs, lasts.

author
Emotions Laughter

My shrink told me that my happiness was stress related.

(1947 – ) comedian & actor
Emotions Happiness Self

Happier than a pig in slop

Emotions Expressions Happiness

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

(1706 – 1790) American statesman, author, scientist & inventor
Alcohol Beer Emotions Food/Drink God Happiness

What’s the point of having children if you can’t buy their love?

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Children Emotions Family Love TV/Movie Quotes

Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings… and lawyers.

(1940 – 2005) comedian & movie actor
Emotions Government Law Lawyers Marriage

As my mother always says, “If you have to swear to get laughs, then you’re obviously a c**t.”

(1972 – ) Irish stand-up comedian, voice over artist & actor
Communication Emotions Laughter Speech

If I weren’t earning $3 million a year to dunk a basketball, most people in the street would run in the other direction if they saw me coming.

(1963 – ) American professional basketball player & sports personality
Appearance Body Fear

Happiness is the interval between periods of unhappiness.

(1878 – 1937) humorist, journalist & author
Emotions Happiness Time

It isn’t necessary to have relatives in Kansas City in order to be unhappy.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Emotions Happiness Places

A clown is like aspirin, only he works twice as fast.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Emotions People

Creator: a comedian whose audience is afraid to laugh.

(1880 – 1956) journalist, essayist, editor & satirist
Emotions Laughter

I don't mind their having a lot of money, and I don't care how they employ it, but I do think that they damn well ought to admit they enjoy it.

(1902 – 1971) American humorist & poet
Emotions Happiness Money Wealth

The bravest thing that men do is love women.

(1927 – ) Canadian-born American comedian & actor
Emotions Love Men People Women

I can still enjoy sex at 74; I live at 75, so it's no distance.

(1928 – 2003) English entertainer
Age Emotions Sex

Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

Anger Characteristics Emotions

I lost my mood ring and now I don't how to feel about it.

(1968 – ) American actor & comedian
Emotions Things

I can’t do two things at once; I can’t have intercourse and enjoy myself at the same time.

(1947 – ) comedian & actor
Emotions Happiness

I know what they're waiting for…(the press) is waiting for (Michelle Obama) to get pissed one night and throw all The President's (stuff) out on the lawn.

(1964 – ) American writer, stand-up comedian, actress, television host
Beliefs Emotions Opinion