Subject: Entertainment (Page 16)

Jane Fonda coming back to the screen after a decade-and-a-half absence in Monster-in-Law is like Brando returning from the dead to star in a Police Academy movie.

(1952 – ) American film critic & columnist
Entertainment Film Insults

My father originated the limbo dance… trying to get into a pay toilet.

(1921 – 1995) American comedian & actor
Dance Entertainment

[Memorial services are the] cocktail parties of the geriatric set.

(1902 – 1983) English actor
Age Death Entertainment

The trouble with this business is that the stars keep ninety per cent of my money.

(1906 – 1998) Russian-born English film producer & media mogul
Entertainment Film

Some of my best leading men have been dogs and horses.

(1932 – 2011) British-American actress
Entertainment Film

For me, the cinema is not a slice of life, but a piece of cake.

(1899 – 1980) English filmmaker & producer
Entertainment Film Food/Drink Life

I just did a show at a country and western bar, and – this is true – I had been onstage, like, a minute and a half when I heard: 'Never come here again!' … and I thought, 'Oh my gosh, did I just say that out loud?'

stand-up comedian
Communication Entertainment Speech

My greatest acting performance is when I check the caller ID, then adopt an air of polite curiosity as I answer the phone “Hello?”

(1973 – ) animator, writer, actor & producer
Acting Entertainment

People think I hate sex; I don’t; I just don’t like things that stop you seeing the television properly.

(1953 – 2016) British comedian, actress, singer & screenwriter
Entertainment Sex Television

I only know two tunes: one of them is “Yankee Doodle” and the other isn’t.

(1822 – 1885) 18th U.S. president & army general
Entertainment Music

Agent: Someone who believes an actor takes 85 percent of his money.

Acting Definitions Entertainment

Acting: A good training for political life; the only problem is the speeches are harder to learn.

(1911 – 2004) 40th U.S. president & actor
Acting Entertainment Occupations

What do you want me to do … stop shooting now and release it as The Five Commandments?

(1881 – 1959) American film director & producer
Entertainment Film

I can’t watch TV longer than five minutes without praying for nuclear holocaust.

(1961 – 1994) comedian
Entertainment Television

I like Wagner's music better than any other music; it is so loud that one can talk the whole time without people hearing what one says.

(1854 – 1900) Irish dramatist, novelist & poet
Insults Music

Watching Tallulah Bankhead on the stage is like watching somebody skating on thin ice – everyone wants to be there when it breaks.

(1865-1940) English actress
Acting Reviews/Criticism

Golf is my real profession – show business pays my greens fees.

(1903 – 2003) English-born American comedian & actor
Acting Entertainment Golf Sports

Any fool can paint a picture, but it takes a wise man to be able to sell it.

(1835 – 1902) English composer, author & satirist
Entertainment

If opera is entertainment, then falling off a roof is transportation!

fictional mascot and cover boy of Mad, an American humor magazine
Entertainment

Television opened up a whole new field of unemployment for him.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Acting Entertainment Insults Television

Ed Sullivan will be around as long as someone else has talent.

(1894 – 1956) American radio comedian
Entertainment Success