Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
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Subject:
Entertainment
(Page 2)
Berlioz composes by splashing his pen over the manuscript and leaving the issue to chance.
Frédéric Chopin
(1810 – 1849) Polish composer & virtuoso pianist
Entertainment
Insults
Music
On French composer Hector Berlioz
Elwood: Eh… what kind of music do you usually have here?Claire: Oh, we got both kinds. We got country
and
western.
Sheilah Wells
(1941 – ) American actress
Entertainment
Music
TV/Movie Quotes
As Claire in “The Blues Brothers”
Nowadays Mitchum doesn’t so much act as point his suit at people.
Russell Davies
(1946 – ) British journalist & broadcaster
Acting
Reviews/Criticism
Of Robert MItchum
There are more bad musicians than there is bad music.
Isaac Stern
(1920 – 2001) Soviet-born violinist & conductor
Entertainment
Music
Musicians
Good art is in the wallet of the beholder.
Kathy Lette
(1958 – ) Australian author
Art
Entertainment
Money
I know [canned music] makes chickens lay more eggs and factory workers produce more, but how much more can they get out of you on an elevator?
Victor Borge
(1909 – 2000) Danish-born comedian & pianist
Entertainment
Music
Elevators
The only way to entertain some folks is to listen to them.
Frank ‘Kin’ Hubbard
(1868 – 1930) cartoonist, humorist & journalist
Communication
Entertainment
Listening
I used to be a mime…. but now I can talk about it…
Stewart Francis
Canadian stand-up comedian, actor & writer
Communication
Entertainment
Occupations
Speech
Work
Mimes
I find his films about as funny as getting an arrow through the neck and discovering there's a gas bill tied to it.
Rowan Atkinson
(1955 – ) English actor
Entertainment
Film
Charlie Chaplin
No… but I have trodden in some.
Thomas Beecham
(1879 – 1961) English conductor
Insults
Music
German composer
When asked if he had played any Stockhausen
Acting is all about big hair and funny props… all the great actors knew it.
Harold Ramis
(1944 – 2014) American actor, director & writer
Acting
Entertainment
Extraordinary how potent cheap music is.
Noel Coward
(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Entertainment
Music
Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.
Homer Simpson
cartoon character in
The Simpsons
(Dan Castellaneta)
Entertainment
Television
TV/Movie Quotes
The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder.
Alfred Hitchcock
(1899 – 1980) English filmmaker & producer
Entertainment
Film
Bladders
For God's sake, go and tell that young man to take that Rockingham tea service out of his tights.
Noel Coward
(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Entertainment
Insults
Coward said to the choreographer when a male dancer in one of his plays forgot to wear the proper support
Criticism
Theater
It’s funny how psychos are always so much scarier when they’re pretty girls.
A.A. Gill
(1954 – ) British writer & critic
Entertainment
Film
Reviewing “Fallen Angel”
People like to hear me say 'shit' in my gorgeous voice.
John Gielgud
(1904 – 2000) English actor, director & producer
Acting
Entertainment
People
Self
On his popularity in America
The cable TV sex channels don't expand our horizons, don't make us better people and don't come in clearly enough.
Bill Maher
(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Entertainment
Sex
Television
The people who gave us golf and called it a game are the same people who gave us bag pipes and called it music.
Silk Stockings TV Show
Entertainment
Golf
Music
Sports
Bagpipes
Politics is developing more comedians than radio ever did.
Jimmy Durante
(1893 – 1980) American singer, pianist, comedian & actor
Entertainment
Government
Politicians
Comedians
The real reason I decided on show business was to avoid a day job.
Rob Schneider
(1963 – ) American actor, comedian, screenwriter & director
Entertainment
Work
Sshow business
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