Subject: Entertainment (Page 24)

I know [canned music] makes chickens lay more eggs and factory workers produce more, but how much more can they get out of you on an elevator?

(1909 – 2000) Danish-born comedian & pianist
Entertainment Music

If you must keep groaning, please try to do it in a rhythm I can dance to.

(1933 – ) English author & cartoonist
Communication Dance Speech

For God's sake, go and tell that young man to take that Rockingham tea service out of his tights.

(1899 – 1973) English playwright, actor, composer, director & songwriter
Entertainment Insults

Orlando Bloom was so wooden he could have played the horse.

Irish film critic
Acting Reviews/Criticism

I told them sandwiches.

(1949 – ) American boxing champion
Boxing Entertainment Food/Drink Sports Television

Days off.

(1900 – 1967) American film actor
Acting Entertainment Film Work

Devotees of awful filmmaking can't go wrong with this one.

movie critic
Film Insults

Remember you are just an extra in everyone else’s play.

(1882 – 1945) 32nd U.S. president
Acting Entertainment Life

U2’s lawyers work pro bono.

Jewish-American stand-up comedian & writer
Entertainment Lawyers Music

The only reason Woodstock was necessary is because they didn't have iTunes.

(1975 – ) American stand-up comedian & television host
Entertainment Music

Art is science made clear.

(1876 – 1933) screenwriter
Art Science/Weather

They're not understudies, they're overstudies.

(1889 – 1961) Am. playwright, theater director & producer & humorist
Acting Entertainment

Motor racing's less of a sport these days than a commercial break doing 150 mph.

sportswriter
Auto racing Entertainment Sports Television

If you have watched a TV series only once, and you watch it again, it will be a rerun of the same episode.

Entertainment Murphy’s Laws Television

Then we figured out we could just park them in front of the TV; that's how I was raised and I turned out TV.

cartoon character in The Simpsons (Dan Castellaneta)
Children Television TV/Movie Quotes

I’m always afraid that somewhere out there, there is one person in the audience that I’m not going to offend!

(1926 – 2017) American stand-up comedian & actor
Entertainment

I would imagine if you could understand Morse Code, a tap dancer would drive you crazy.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Entertainment Intelligence

I know this music from memory, not from the music.

(1899 – 1985) Hungarian-born conductor & violinist
Entertainment Memory Misspokements Music

Life doesn’t imitate art, it imitates bad television.

(1935 – ) movie actor, director & comedian
Art Entertainment Life Television

The original Mickey Mouse cartoon was in Mouse, with English subtitles.

comedian
Communication Entertainment Language

It’s no good pretending that any relationship has a future if your record collections disagree violently or if your favorite films wouldn’t even speak to each other if they met at a party.

(1957 – ) English novelist, essayist & screenwriter
Entertainment Music Relationships