Subject: Entertainment (Page 36)

You spend all your time trying to do what they put people in asylums for.

(1937 – ) American actress, writer, political activist, & fitness exponent
Acting Entertainment

My husband, who hardly ever listens to the radio anymore, has this one on all the time.

Classifieds Entertainment

A great actress, from the waist down.

(1848 – 1935) English actress
Acting Insults

After Rossini dies, who will there be to promote his music?

(1813 – 1883) German composer, conductor, theatre director & essayist
Entertainment Insults Music

Accordion: A pleated bagpipe.

Definitions Entertainment Music Things

Longfellow is to poetry what the barrel-organ is to music.

(1886 – 1963) literary critic, biographer & historian
Insults Music Reading/Writing

Any fool can paint a picture, but it takes a wise man to be able to sell it.

(1835 – 1902) English composer, author & satirist
Entertainment

All tragedies are finished by a death, all comedies by a marriage.

(1788 – 1824) English poet
Entertainment Marriage

Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act.

(1924 – 1984) American author
Entertainment Life Reading/Writing

I can't get a relationship to last longer than it takes to make copies of their tapes.

stand-up comedian, actor, writer & producer
Dating Entertainment Music Relationships

Television: A means of getting a babysitter so Mom and Dad can get out to the movies.

Definitions Entertainment Television

Acting is all about honesty and if you can fake that, you've got it made.

(1896 – 1996) comedian, actor & entertainer
Acting Characteristics Entertainment Honesty

Accordian: An instrument inharmony with the sentiments of an assassin.

(1842 – 1914) author & satirist
Definitions Entertainment Music

A movie so good they named a country after it.

(1940 – ) American-born British screenwriter, film director, animator & actor (Monty Python’s Flying Circus)
Entertainment Film

The ice cream truck in my neighborhood plays “Helter Skelter.”

(1955 – ) comedian, actor & writer
Music Situations

I used to work for a living, then I became an actor.

(1927 – ) English actor
Acting Entertainment Occupations Work

You know, the only difference between me and a surgeon or a pediatrician is that when I approach a couple with a child and say, ‘I’d like to keep him for a few days and do some bloodwork,’ it’s considered inappropriate.

(1969 – ) American actress, comedian, producer & writer
Doctors Entertainment Health

Modern dancing is old fashioned.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Dance Misspokements

The program you've been looking forward to all week will be preempted.

Entertainment Murphy’s Laws Television

What is this, an audience or an oil painting?

(1908 – 2002) comedian, radio & television actor
Entertainment People

The titles are listed on the movie theater marquis.

Entertainment Malaprops