Subject: Entertainment (Page 6)

I played in a death-metal band. People either loved us or hated us… or they thought we were OK.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Entertainment

The chief objection of playing wind instruments is that it prolongs the life of the player.

(1856 – 1950) Irish playwright & socialist
Entertainment Music

I think TV is very educational; every time someone turns on a TV, I go in the other room and read.

(1890 – 1977) comedian, actor & television host
Communication Education Entertainment Reading/Writing Television

Those who make a distinction between education and entertainment don't know the first thing about either.

(1911 – 1980) Canadian educator, philosopher & scholar
Education Entertainment

You might be a redneck if… you bought a VCR so you could tape wrestling while you are at work.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Activities People Rednecks Television

Argentina invaded the Falklands because they had ESPN and the Argentines wanted to get the late scores.

(1931 – 2012) American college football historian & television commentator
Entertainment Sports Television

Stand-up is a lot like sex… there’s a lot of crying involved and I get paid to do it.

(1982 – ) American actress & comedian
Entertainment Sex

Men don’t care what’s on TV… they only care what else is on TV.

(1954 – ) comedian & television actor
Entertainment Men People Television

It's ill-becoming for an old broad to sing about how bad she wants it… but occasionally we do.

(1917 – 2010) American singer & actress
Entertainment People Sex Women

Look, it’s my misery that I have to paint this kind of painting, it’s your misery that you have to love it, and the price of the misery is thirteen hundred and fifty dollars.

(1903 – 1970) Russian artist
Art Entertainment

He couldn't ad-lib a fart after a baked-bean dinner.

(1925 – 2005) television host
Beliefs Entertainment Insults Opinion People

Generally, he had a good ear; he didn't know the notes that well, but he played in their general vicinity.

(1934 – ) daughter of Jack Benny and Mary Livingstone
Entertainment Music

The first time I sang in the church choir; two hundred people changed their religion.

(1894 – 1956) American radio comedian
Beliefs Music Religion

You know, you can’t please all the people all the time… and last night, all those people were at my show.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Characteristics Entertainment People

After conducting a concert in a small town, I once received the following note from a farmer who had attended the performance: “Dear Sir, I wish to inform you that the man who played the long thing you pull in and out only did so during the brief periods you were looking at him.

(1867 – 1957) Italian conductor
Entertainment Music

An actor is the kind of guy who, if you ain't talking about him, ain't listening.

(1910 – 1984) American film producer & publicist
Acting Entertainment Occupations

Art, like morality, consists in drawing a line somewhere.

(1874 – 1936) English author & mystery novelist
Art Entertainment

I am playing all the right notes, but not necessarily in the right order.

(1926 – 1984) English comedian
Entertainment Music

My Comedy Channel – Fox News

My News Channel Comedy Central

Entertainment Signs Television

The problem with women in an orchestra is that if they’re attractive it will upset my players and if they’re not it will upset me.

(1879 – 1961) English conductor
Appearance Entertainment Music People Women

Without him here, it is impossible to know how fast he will play it, approximately.

(1899 – 1985) Hungarian-born conductor & violinist
Entertainment Misspokements Music