Subject: Entertainment » Television

Remember that show My Three Sons? … it’d be funny if it was called My One Dad.

(1968 – 2005) American stand-up comedian
Entertainment Television

Why should people go out and pay to see bad movies when they can stay home and see bad television for nothing.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Entertainment Film Television

You know you’re getting old when you start watching golf on TV and enjoying it.

(1953 – ) American comedian, actor, voice artist, & columnist
Age Entertainment Golf Old Television

Television has raised writing to a new low.

(1879 – 1974) film producer
Communication Entertainment Misspokements Reading/Writing Television

Dictum on television scripts: We don't want it good – we want it Tuesday.

(1922 – ) English comedy writer & television presenter
Communication Entertainment Reading/Writing Television

I watch so much Netflix that, rather than suggesting more shows for me to watch, it’s started suggesting I go outside.

British stand-up comedian
Entertainment Television

The best that can be said for Norwegian television is that it gives you the sensation of a coma without the worry and inconvenience

American author
Places Television

The Three Ages of Marriage: Twenty is when you watch the TV after; Forty is when you watch the TV during; Sixty is when you watch the TV instead.

Entertainment Marriage Sex Television

The cable TV sex channels don't expand our horizons, don't make us better people and don't come in clearly enough.

(1956 – ) comedian, television host, social critic & political commentator
Entertainment Sex Television

You might be a redneck if… the Home Shopping operator recognizes your voice.

(1958 – ) stand-up comedian & television personality
Entertainment People Rednecks Shopping Television

If there are only two shows worth watching, they will be on at the same time.

Entertainment Murphy’s Laws Television

Entertainment is a thing of the past, today we’ve got television.

television character, All In the Family (Carroll O’Connor)
Entertainment Misspokements Television

TV: a clever contraction, derived from the words Terrible Vaudeville; we call it a medium, because nothing's well done.

(Aiskowitz) (1899 – 1982) humorist
Entertainment Television

I wish there was a knob on the TV so you could turn up the intelligence; they got one marked “brightness” but it don’t work, does it?

(1946 – ) American comedian
Entertainment Television

If it weren't for the fact that the TV set and the refrigerator are so far apart, some of us wouldn't get any exercise at all.

(1911 – 1999) comedian, author & columnist
Activities Exercise Television

If vaudeville had died, television was the box they put it in.

(1928 – 2009) American television writer, playwright, screenwriter & author
Entertainment Television

MTV is to music as KFC is to chicken.

(1948 – ) stand-up comedian, actor, author & playwright
Entertainment Music Television

This is good because up until now, the only channel to find 24-hour coverage of the NFL players was Court TV.

(1963 – ) television host & comedian
Entertainment Football Television

I would like to be able to watch the evening news with my family and not have to explain what oral sex means to my wife.

American comedian & writer
Entertainment Sex Television

If it’s attention you want, don’t get involved with a man during play-off season.

(1953 – ) comedian, dancer & writer
Men People Sports Television

Television enables you to be entertained in your home by people you wouldn't have in your home.

(1939 – ) British journalist, comedian, writer & media personality
Entertainment Television