Subject: Epitaphs (Page 22)

Beneath this smooth stone by the bone of his bone – Sleeps Master John Gill; – By lies when alive this attorney did thrive, – And now that he's dead he lies still.

Epitaphs Lawyers Lies

Here lies James Dunn – he raced for the crossing but the train won

Epitaphs

Here lies Kelly, we buried him today. He lived the life of Riley, when Riley was away!

Epitaphs

This stone was raised by Frieda's Lord, not Frieda's virtues to record, for they are known to all the town. This stone was raised to keep her down.

Epitaphs

In Memory of Jacob, third son of Capt. Jacob Rice, died May 7, 1818 Et. 9 yrs. – His death was occasioned by the fall of a dung fork, one tine penetrating his brain.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of Robert Lowe. Whither he’s gone I do not know. If to the realms of peace and love, farewell to happiness above. If to a place of lower level, I don’t congratulate the d…l.

Epitaphs

Here lies the worst king and the most miserable man in the kingdom.

Epitaphs

Here lies Elizabeth, my wife for 47 years, and this is the first damn thing she ever done to oblige me.

Epitaphs

Here into the dust, the mouldering crust, of Eleanour Bachelour's shoven; well versed in the arts of pies, custards, and tarts. And the lucrative skill of the oven. When she lived long enough, she made her last puff, a puff by her husband much praised, now here she doth lie and makes a dirt pie, in hopes that her crust shall be raised.

Epitaphs

Now Go Away and Leave Me Alone

Epitaphs

Here Lieth W.W. – Who never more will, trouble you, trouble you

Epitaphs

Here lieth Richard Dent in his last tenement.

Epitaphs

The dame that rests beneath this tomb, had Rachel's beauty, Leah's fruitful womb, Abigail's wisdom, Lydia's faithful heart, Martha's just care, and Mary's better part.

Epitaphs

Neal Keven – His accounts were found square to a cent.

Epitaphs

Grim death took me without any warning. I was well at night, and dead in the morning.

Epitaphs

36-33-01-24-17 – Honey you don't know what you did for me, – Always playing the lottery. – The numbers you picked came in to play, – Two days after you passed away. – For this, a huge monument I do erect, – For now I get a yearly check. – How I wish you were alive, – For now we are worth 8.5

Epitaphs

Here lies my wife, here lies she; Hallelujah! Hallelujee!

Epitaphs

This is the last long resting place, Of Aunt Jemima Jones, Her soul ascended into space, Amidst our tears and groans, She was not pleasing to the eye, Nor had she any brain, And when she talked twas through her nose, Which gave her friends much pain, But still we feel that she was worth, The money that was spent, upon the coffin, hearse and stone (The funeral plumes were lent).

Epitaphs

A live Dog is better than a dead Lion. Come drop a tear as you pass by, as you are now so once was I, as I am now you soon must be, prepare for death and follow me.

Epitaphs

Sacred to twins Charlie and Varlie. Sons of loving parents who died in infancy.

Epitaphs

Elizabeth Scott lies buried here, She was born Nov 20th 1785, according to the best of her recollection.

Epitaphs