Subject: Epitaphs (Page 23)

John Summer – An English Teacher who Could not only Spell the word "Epitaph" correctly, But also knew what it means.

Epitaphs

I've finally stopped getting dumber.

Epitaphs

Hi! – Stay high – Bye

Epitaphs

Here lies one who for medicine would not give, a little gold, and so his life he lost: I fancy now he'd wish again to live, could he but guess how much his funeral cost.

Epitaphs

The dame that rests beneath this tomb, had Rachel's beauty, Leah's fruitful womb, Abigail's wisdom, Lydia's faithful heart, Martha's just care, and Mary's better part.

Epitaphs

Here lies Gilles. He used no net, Knew no fear. He made a misstep And wound up here

Epitaphs

One Errant Female Has Fun – The Ornament of Her Generation – Beautiful. Witty. Brilliant. Talented. Elegant. Charming. Frugal and Modest. – Erected By Herself

Epitaphs

She lived genteely on a small income.

Epitaphs

Until the brakes are turned on time, – Life's throttle-valve shut down. – He works to pilot in the crew – That wears the martyr's crown. – On schedule time, on upper grade – Along the homeward section. – He lands his train in God's roundhouse – The mom of resurrection. – His time is full, no wages docked, – His name on God's pay roll. – And transportation through to Heaven – A free pass for his soul.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of Jane Gordon. With mouth almighty and teeth accordin!

Epitaphs

We all have a debt – To nature due – I've paid mine – And so must you.

Epitaphs

School is out. Teacher Has gone home

Epitaphs

She failed her breathalizer test now she lays with the best

Epitaphs

Stranger pause my tale attend, and learn the cause of Hannah’s end. Across the world the wind did blow, she ketched a cold that laid her low. We shed a lot of tears ‘tis true, but life is short – aged 82.

Epitaphs

Mary, Mary, quite contrary How does your garden grow? Quite well, I bet, Since it's well fed By her body decomposing below.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of John Mound, lost at sea and never found.

Epitaphs

Curly – Joe DeRita, “The Last Stooge” July 12, 1909 – July 3, 1993

Epitaphs

No doctor ever physicked me, was never near my side. But when fever came I thought of the name, and that was enough – I died.

Epitaphs

Lie heavy on him, earth, for he laid many a heavy load on thee.

Epitaphs

Here rests an old woman who always was tired, for she lived in a house where no help was hired; Her very last words were, “My friends I am goin*, to a land where there's nothin' of washin' or sewin', and everything there shall be just to ray wishes, for where they don't eat there's no washin' of dishes; the land with sweet anthems is constantly ringin', but having no voice I'll get clear of the singin'." She folded her hands, her latest endeavor, and whispered, "Oh nothin', sweet nothin forever."

Epitaphs

Here lies Charles. Had six guns Needed seven. Now he is in heaven

Epitaphs