Subject: Epitaphs (Page 4)

Cold is my bed, but oh, I love it, – for colder are my friends above it.

Epitaphs

I had a lover's quarrel with the world

Epitaphs

Reader if cash thou are – In want of any – dig 4 feet deep – And thou wilt find a Penny.

Epitaphs

He died in bed.

Epitaphs

Sh-h-h

Epitaphs

He got a fish bone in his throat – And then he sang an angel's note.

Epitaphs

Here lies two brothers by misfortune surrounded; one died of his wounds but the other was drownded.

Epitaphs

Come blooming youths, as you pass by, And on these lines do cast an eye. As you are now, so once was I; As I am now, so must you be; Prepare for death and follow me.

Epitaphs

Here lies John Higley whose father and mother were drowned in their passage from America. Had they both lived they would have been buried here.

Epitaphs

She was in health at 11.30 A. M. – And left for Heaven at 3.30 P. M.

Epitaphs

Here lies John Auricular, Who in the ways of the Lord walked perpendicular.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of Edward Hyde. We laid him here because he died.

Epitaphs

I've finally stopped getting dumber.

Epitaphs

He has gone to the only place where his own works are excelled.

Epitaphs

Here lies a lewd Fellow, who, while he drew Breath, In the Midst of his Life was in Quest of his Death; Which he quickly obtain'd for it cost him his Life, For being in Bed with another Man's Wife.

Epitaphs

Fair maiden Lilliard – lies under this stane – little was her stature – but muckle was her fame – upon the English loons – she laid monie thumps – and when her legs were cuttit off – she fought upon her stumps.

Epitaphs

For a good time, dig.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of our Anna, Done to death by a banana. It wasn't the fruit that laid her low, But the skin of the thing that made her go.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of Arkansas Jim. We made the mistake, but the joke's on him.

Epitaphs

The children of Israel wanted bread and the Lord sent them manna. Old clerk Wallace wanted a wife, and the Devil sent him Anna.

Epitaphs

An excellent husband was this Mr. Danner, – He lived in a thoroughly honorable manner. – He may have had troubles. – But they burst like bubbles. – He's at peace, now with Mary, Jane Susan and Hannah.

Epitaphs