Subject: Epitaphs (Page 7)

This is the last long resting place, Of Aunt Jemima Jones, Her soul ascended into space, Amidst our tears and groans, She was not pleasing to the eye, Nor had she any brain, And when she talked twas through her nose, Which gave her friends much pain, But still we feel that she was worth, The money that was spent, upon the coffin, hearse and stone (The funeral plumes were lent).

Epitaphs

Here lies an honest lawyer – and that is Strange.

Epitaphs

Curiosity did not kill this cat.

Epitaphs

Here lies Bryan Wilkinson – The doc said he'd be 'alright,’ Guess doc was all wrong

Epitaphs

Due to lack of ground in this cemetery, two bodies are buried in this one plot. One of them was a politician, the other was an honest man.

Epitaphs

He looked for gold and died of lead poison

Epitaphs

Samuel Gardner was blind in one eye and in a moment of confusion he stepped out of a receiving and discharging door in one of the warehouses into the ineffable glories of the celestial sphere.

Epitaphs

Good friends for Jesus' sake forbear – To stir the dust enclosed here. – Blest be the man who spares these stones – And cursed be he who moves my bones.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of John Round. Lost at sea and never found.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of Elred. At least he will be when he is dead. But now at this time he's still alive, 14th August '65.

Epitaphs

Here lies the body of Detlof Swenson, waiter. God finally caught his eye.

Epitaphs

Stephen and Time are now both even. Stephen beat Time and now Time's beat Stephen.

Epitaphs

Here lies Donald and his wife Janett McPhee, aged 40 he and 30 she.

Epitaphs

Beneath this smooth stone by the bone of his bone, Sleeps Master John Gill; By lies when alive this attorney did thrive, And now that he's dead he lies still.

Epitaphs

On the four husbands of Ivy Saunders: Here lies my husbands 1 – 2 – 3. As still as men could ever be. As for the fourth: Praise be to God He still abides above the sod: Abel, Seth and Leidy were the first 3 names and to make things tidy I'll add his – James.

Epitaphs

ASSMAN

Epitaphs

Sacred to Wm Collis boat-steerer of the ship St George of New Bedford, who by the will of Almighty God was killed by a whale off this Island

Epitaphs

Here I at length repose, My spirit now at aise is; With the tips of my toes And the point of my nose Turned up to the roots of the daisies.

Epitaphs

Without you, Heaven would be too dull to bear
And Hell would not be Hell if you are there.

(1906 – 1992) English academic, barrister & book-collector
Epitaphs

Here lies one that once was born and cried, Lived several years — and then he died

Epitaphs

Stranger pause my tale attend, and learn the cause of Hannah’s end. Across the world the wind did blow, she ketched a cold that laid her low. We shed a lot of tears ‘tis true, but life is short – aged 82.

Epitaphs