Quotes and One Liners
humorous one-liners, quotations, jokes, Murphy's Laws & more
Home
About
Categories
Activities
Age
Animals
Appearance
Beliefs
Characteristics
Communication
Conflict
Death
Education
Emotions
Entertainment
Family
Food/Drink
Government
Health
Intelligence
Life
Marriage
Miscellaneous
Money
People
Places
Problems
Relationships
Science/Weather
Sex
Situations
Sports
Success
Things
Time
Work
Additional Categories
Book Titles
Confucius say
Definitions
Epitaphs
Exaggerations
Expressions
Hollywood Squares
Insults
Last Words
Murphy's Laws
Place Names
Proverbs
Reviews/Criticism
Song Titles
Tom Swifties
TV/Movie Quotes
Oops...
Bushisms
Church Bulletins
Classified Ads
Colemanballs
Headlines
Malaprops
Misspokements
Signs
Translations
Yogi-isms
Some Popular Authors
Abraham Lincoln
Alfred E. Neuman
Ambrose Bierce
Benjamin Franklin
Dave Barry
Demetri Martin
Dorothy Parker
Emo Phillips
George Carlin
Groucho Marx
H.L. Mencken
Homer Simpson
Jeff Foxworthy
Jimmy Carr
Joan Rivers
Mae West
Mark Twain
Mitch Hedberg
Oscar Wilde
Phyllis Diller
Richard Lewis
Rita Rudner
Rodney Dangerfield
Steven Wright
Stewart Francis
W.C. Fields
Will Rogers
Woody Allen
View All Authors
Subject:
Exaggerations
(Page 3)
It was so cold… we didn't clean the house – we just defrosted it.
Anonymous
Cold
Exaggerations
Science/Weather
He is so stupid… he got fired from an M&M factory for throwing out all the W's.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Intelligence
Stupidity
He is so fat… when he ran away, they had to use all four sides of the milk carton.
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Exaggerations
Fat
He is so fat… his driver's license says, “picture continued on other side.”
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Exaggerations
Fat
The report of my death was an exaggeration.
Mark Twain
Samuel Clemens (1835 – 1910) author & humorist
Communication
Death
Exaggerations
He is so fat… his high school graduation picture was an aerial photograph.
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Exaggerations
Fat
She is so fat… the police told her to break it up.
Anonymous
Appearance
Exaggerations
Fat
It is so hot… the cows arre giving evaporated milk.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
So windy he could blow up an onion sack.
Anonymous
Communication
Exaggerations
Expressions
Speech
Talkative
She is so ugly… when she was born, the doctor slapped the wrong end.
Anonymous
Appearance
Exaggerations
Ugly
It was so cold… my shadow froze to the sidewalk.
Anonymous
Cold
Exaggerations
Science/Weather
It is so hot… I saw a squirrel fanning his nuts.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Heat
Science/Weather
He is so stupid… mind readers charge him half price.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Intelligence
Stupidity
I saw a mosquito in Alaska so big… I could see his brand.
Anonymous
Animals
Exaggerations
Places
Alaska
Mosquitoes
She is so fat… when she was a kid she could only play seek.
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Exaggerations
Fat
She is so ugly… when she goes swimming the tide goes out.
Anonymous
Appearance
Exaggerations
Ugly
She is so stupid… she stared at an orange juice carton for twenty minutes because the label said "concentrate."
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Intelligence
Stupidity
He is so fat… his shadow weighs 12 pounds.
Anonymous
Appearance
Body
Exaggerations
Fat
She is so ugly… when she walked in to Taco Bell, everyone ran for the border.
Anonymous
Appearance
Exaggerations
Ugly
It is so dry… I caught a catfish that had ticks on him.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Science/Weather
Dry
She’s so stupid… if you give her a penny for her thoughts, you'll get change back.
Anonymous
Exaggerations
Intelligence
Stupidity
Page 3 of 6
« Previous
1
2
3
4
5
Next »
Last »