Subject: Exaggerations (Page 3)

She is so ugly… when she was born, the doctor slapped the wrong end.

Appearance Exaggerations Ugly

He is so fat… he has group insurance.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

He is so poor… he can't even pay attention.

Exaggerations Money Poverty

She is so old… she's in God's year book.

Age Exaggerations Old

It was so cold… the politicians had their hands in their own pockets.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

It was so cold… we didn't clean the house – we just defrosted it.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

She is so thin… she doesn’t cast a shadow.

Appearance Body Exaggerations

It was so cold… politicians stopped blowing hot air.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child; she must be found and stopped.

(1911 – 1980) humorist, writer, television host & journalist
Children Exaggerations People Women

He is so fat… when he gets in an elevator, it has to go down.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

She is so ugly… when she gets up, the sun goes down.

Appearance Exaggerations Ugly

His ears are so big… he heard the sun come up.

Appearance Body Exaggerations

His head is so big… he has to step into his shirts.

Appearance Body Exaggerations

He is so stupid… mind readers charge him half price.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity

If I asked for a cup of coffee, someone would search for the double meaning.

(1893 – 1980) actress, playwright, screenwriter & sex symbol
Communication Exaggerations Language

She is so fat… when you tell her to haul ass, she gotta make two trips.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

She is so fat… when she turns around, people throw her a welcome back party.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

He is so fat… his driver's license says, “picture continued on other side.”

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

It was so cold… we had lunch at the "Greasy Spoon" – just for the heartburn.

Cold Exaggerations Science/Weather

He is so fat… when his beeper goes off, people think he's backing up.

Appearance Body Exaggerations Fat

He is so dumb, blondes tell jokes about him.

Exaggerations Intelligence Stupidity